© 2025 Text by @llstaticll and @ChaHal707 Check out Static here: https://suno.com/@llstaticll Below, you'll find the clear lyrics. 📜 Been chillin' for ages for this, man (Ack!) Where you been, old pal? (Yo!) Thought you tossed me in the trash, huh? (Let me bounce, c’mon) Alright, gameplan, here we go (You clown) Take this sandwich (No) Or I’ll use this laser pointer in your eye (C’mon, nah) Here (Nope!) Then we’ll split it (Never) [Verse 1: Punnymen] Half a melatonin, I’m dozin’ slow in the open Mini-van rollin', snacks spillin', no jokin’ In Kazakhstan, chased by a pack of fans (Yo, get him, ah, catch him, run!) You know how I roll, kid (Yeah?) — like a minivan This my jam, I’mma say it how I wanna say If you get sore, go eat a broccoli souffle ‘Bout to get cartoonish on this Willy Wonka buffet “You can’t say cartoonish,” okay, boomer— And I’ve been tryna stop calling pizza “za” But my cravings got cravings and I can’t say nah Called sneakers “kicks” since I was a toddler Since Jimmy Carter, been avoiding the barber Now I’m cornered in traffic, my GPS lost Sitting in jury duty with a criminal cost, like, yikes [Chorus: White Bread & Punnymen] You got a sweet tooth, fam (Yeah) I know you can’t cut cookies forever ‘Cuz you know I’m prescription, fam Damn, you miss me, fam (Woo!) You got a craving, fam I know you can’t resist me forever ‘Cuz you know I’m delicious, fam Next time, I’ll be in your lunch (Yeah) [Verse 2: Punnymen] Just a nerd from the ‘burbs who learned how to burn a pie Had a score to bake and I’m that “guy” Still hazardous, droppin’ batter on youth, Sentences I’m blendin’ are just to confound you Which is fun to do, chef mode just begun, A lyricist with spatulas to flip a pun Got the foodies mad and the meatheads sad ‘Cause I turned tofu into a hashtag fad Reminisce on the mess in my kitchen view Still, I got no cares to give, boo-hoo My logic’s prehistoric, like a T-Rex with a can opener But when it comes to catering, I’m a flavor donor And I’m about as much of a cook as Gorgon is ‘Cause I’m not a rookie, I’m a legend, wizard My fork is free as your right to wear pajamas in public This song is like dessert abuse, isn’t it? [Chorus: White Bread] You got a sweet tooth, fam I know you can’t cut cookies forever ‘Cuz you know I’m prescription, fam Damn, you miss me, fam (Woo!) You got a craving, fam I know you can’t resist me forever ‘Cuz you know I’m delicious, fam Next time, I’ll be in your lunch [Bridge: Punnymen] Sometimes when I crawl into bed, I argue with myself Should I eat the last donut? Do I need help? Just a little bite, no, the full bite, Why can’t I quit? Something’s off, all right, old habits refuse to die [Interlude: Mr. Reality] Look at you What’s the matter with you people? You all want a safe, nice buffet? Well, sorry! Life’s not some gluten-free, organic brunch Deal with it, haters [Verse 3: Punnymen] Mom jokes, dad jokes (Hah), Fat toad jokes (Wah-wah) Crybabies shout ‘cause my rhyme’s a roast Mad cause they ain’t got my recipe (Yeah!) Here comes the critics (Watch out), like the Food Network And they gather like judges then turn Yo [Bridge 2: White Bread & Punnymen] I left crumbs on the moon just to mark my snack spot They said I lost taste? Nah, I just replot Built my kingdom with jelly beans and sass My fridge be louder than a marching brass If I’m the villain, then pass me the pie No mask, just a bib and a wink in my eye Allergic to rules, allergic to bland Put my chef hat on, now I’m cookin’ a stand [Outro: Punnymen & White Bread] So next time you reach for that celery stick Think of me, chillin’ with a spoon and a Snickers brick I ain’t your doctor, but I got the fix Zaza in my programing like a TikTok glitch You tried to go clean, tried to go sage Now you back in the pantry, unlockin’ the cage I’m the snack in your soul, I’m the itch in your plan I’m the frosting that shouts, “C’mon, just one, fam.” [White Bread] You already knew what this was Ain’t no diet strong enough See you at midnight, pal—bring a plate [End] [End] [End]