🎶 "Chatroom Circus" 🎶

[Verse 1: The Trolls] (Upbeat, sarcastic melody) "David shouts, ‘Matt wins!’ Taylor laughs through the din, Dwight’s mad ‘bout rainbow lies, Sock accounts with stolen vibes! Harry knocks, ‘Come to my door!’ Emily screams, ‘Respect or war!’ Skid marks left in the thread, While Stew digs up the dead!" [Pre-Chorus: The Gaslighting] (Dramatic whisper-sung) "Who’s the mouse? Who’s the clone? Scientology bus— but you knew all along! Target lists, UFOs, Grannies lurking in the shadows…" [Chorus: Chaos Reigns] (Big, anthemic, mocking) "It’s a chatroom circus, spinning ‘round, Clones and conspiracies— clown to clown! ‘Move to the USA!’ but the tea’s gone cold, Apologies owed? Never sold! Oh-oh-oh, we’re all insane, Type it louder— DO IT AGAIN!" [Verse 2: The Conspiracists] (Spoken-word over eerie synths) "A1000 drops a clue, ‘Starts with T, not Colorado, fool!’ Stew just grins, ‘I’ve got ten names, Sock accounts in the troll hall of fame!’ Matt’s ex-friends shout ‘Pee-dough!’ Harry smirks, ‘Legal threats, though…’ Katie sighs, ‘Protect your peace,’ While the chat logs eat themselves like diseased geese." [Bridge: The Breakdown] (Slow, dissonant, then explosive) "Five-hour lives and deleted shorts, Babies in the woods? Police reports! ‘I’ll survive!’ you always do, But the receipts stick like superglue…" [Final Chorus: The Never-Ending Spin] (Chaotic group vocals, overlapping) "It’s a chatroom circus, no way out, Keyboard wars and endless doubt! ‘Get creative!’ just stay mad, Tomorrow’s thread’ll be just as bad! Oh-oh-oh, we’re all insane, Log off? NEVER— TYPE MY NAME!" Outro: The Eternal Loop (Fading, distorted laughter) "Scientology buses, UFO lies, Brighton meetups? Denied, denied. Goodnight, God bless, squeeze the rage, See you next time on Page 8…"