My Ex Took the Dog, But I Got the Cat

She packed up her suitcase, took half of my life Left the blender, but she took the steak knife And when I saw her note on the welcome mat It said, “I took the dog, but you keep the cat” Now, Rufus was loyal, he was my best friend But ol’ Whiskers, man, she’s got a mean streak to the end She claws up my couch and she drinks my beer But at least she’s still here after all these years My ex took the dog, but I got the cat She ran with the Spaniel, now ain’t that that? She’s sippin’ margaritas, I’m stuck with this brat My ex took the dog, but I got the cat She’s shedding on my pillow, won’t let me sleep At three in the morning, she’s hunting my feet The dog was a gentleman, so calm and so kind But this cat’s a menace, she’s out of her mind Oh, I miss fetchin’ sticks, those long country walks But now it’s just fur balls and judging squawks She sits on the counter, knocks over my hat Man, I swear this cat’s just as crazy as that My ex took the dog, but I got the cat She ran with the Spaniel, now ain’t that that? She’s sippin’ margaritas, I’m stuck with this brat My ex took the dog, but I got the cat So here’s to the heartaches, the ones that don’t last She took my dog, but the memories passed Now it’s me and ol’ Whiskers, we’ll get through that My ex took the dog… but I got the cat