I Was Becoming

I had a little white line in the middle of my chest I don't remember the spill I remember the rest my mom's voice “Hold still.” So I did. I wanted to know the why for every bird and stone Why the moon kept following me Why people called a place home I thought the world was waiting just beyond the yard I thought being brave meant running I didn't know brave could be hard Everybody seemed to know things I thought I'd learn them too There was always something coming There was always something new Something cooo-ming. What? You'll see. What's there? Someone. [VERSE 2] You found the little white line one summer after rain You asked me where I got it I told you the whole thing again You laughed when I said it didn't hurt then touched it with your hand And something old became something new that neither one had planned You traced the place so slowly I forgot what I had said The story wasn't about the falling it was about where your fingers led [low hum] I wanted to know your secrets You wanted to know mine We were young enough to call it forever and old enough to get lost in time What happens next? I'll find out. [CHORUS] I was becoming before I knew I was I was leaving before I knew because I was reaching or a life I couldn't see. Every version of me was already me [breath] I was becoming. I was becoming. [VERSE 3] Then years began arriving with their hands already full A job, a key, a crowded room a thousand things to juggle I learned the shape of responsibility the weight of staying late How love can fill a house with light and still keep you awake The little white line grew paler while the rest of me grew tired I kept waiting for the moment I'd feel properly adult inside Are we? I don't know. I know. Then a small hand found my chest and stopped beside the mark What's that? A long time ago I fell in the daaark. Did it hurt? A little. Does it now? Sometimes. Someone touched it. Someone touched it. Someone touched it. Someone touched it. [CHORUS] I was becoming before I knew I was I was holding before I knew because Hold. Hold meee. Hold on. Hold my hand. Hold... [VERSE 4] There were years I called successful There were years I called a loss There were roads that went somewhere There were roads I never crossed I kept the people I could keep I lost the ones I couldn't I said the things I meant to say And some things that I shouldn't And somewhere in the middle of becoming who I was I started hearing... older voices... inside the things I thought. ] Hold still. Hold still. Hold still. [BRIDGE] Hold still. Hold me. Hold on. Hold my hand. Where are we going? Anywhere. Somewhere. Heeere. I can't find the little white line. It's fading. It's still there. I can see it. I can feel it. [VERSE 5] The skin has changed around it and the years have changed me too The body keeps a different record than the mind intends to My hands don't move like they used to My legs have learned to ache There are mornings when the face I wear shows more history than face But I have known the taste of triumph I have swallowed my regrets I have loved people I was certain I would never quite forget Never quite. forget. forget. And if I could speak to that child. I'm here. I'd tell him what I know: You don't become yourself one time. You become yourself... ...as you go. As we go. As we go. I wanted to know what happens next. I wanted to know what happens next. I wanted to know what happens next. I wanted to know what happens next. I wanted to know. I wanted to go. I wanted to stay. I wanted to know what happened. I wanted everything. I wanted enough. I wanted more time. What's time? You already know.