[Intro] this is the best song ever made and you are about to listen to genius soo strap on in and make sure your compass is working because we are deep in the amazon jungle already and it's already half past three AM in the morning and we all know what happens in the jungle after # in the morning a bid snake god will come from the trees to speak to us about the sacred jaguar that rules our previous lives, previous lives we lead as glass salesmen who came to a far away land to sell window panes to people who needed to look outside from the inside as they sat at kitchen tables drawing images of statues of old forgotten Gods who once ate pumpkins in the rain with angels who came to relay the message that God was on vacation and God is sorry that they couldn't be there they had planned to be away for many months on a trip to Fiji with the family and Jesus really wanted to swim with turtles and Ms. God had dreamed for years of speaking with the manager of a fish shop there that sold a magical fish that when eaten would give a god the power of being human. So now that we have that out of the way, let's start off the most incredible song you have ever heard ohhh yeaaahhhh!! [Hook] Uh uh uuuh uh uh uuh hot dog meat tastes weird huh uh uh uh hot dog meat tastes super weird like salty meat tubes made of God's tears uh uh uh uuuuuh God cried and then the demons they came and collected uh uh made hot dogs out of the tears of the lord and sold them on the streets [Verse] On the streets of New York Where civilization began On the streets of New York eating a hot dog On the streets of New York I stand in the crowd where life first began and taste the sadness of God On the streets of New York where civilization began began began to explore the world from Queens to the Bronx and the rest yeah yeah yeah everyone already know New York New York it's all on the internet I checked it out I booked tickets online and when I got there I saw it all yeah I saw it all on the streets of New York where civilization began where a man selling hot dogs said ("5 dollars!") and I purchased one and it waas ooohhhh I started to taste the taste of a God a God's tears the hot dog I swear it tasted like the sorrow of a God and I could only stomach one bite and I had to throw it away the hotdog tasted like God realized a bad decision and wept into a thin plastic casing the dog was not good you know but that isn't what you came here for you came here to hear the greatest song ever written not some rapper rapping about eating Gods tears that's a joke and no I have never I don't actually know okay well maybe I do but that is between me and the guy who sold me the holy monstrosity I was in Brooklyn and that's what it was and I'm already losing track again because here we are standing in the waiting room of a hospital waiting for our new born son to be born where he will take a years long pilgrimage after being born to plant apple trees along the highways where people live who are hungry and in need he our new son will do this at half past noon on a Friday just three days after his birth where he will dawn a suit and tie and procure a bag of apple seed from the local horse rancher named John who has a strange temperament around people who do not enjoy television shows about nails, and that there ought to be a lot of shows about nails and that there really aren't enough of them and actually there are no actual shows specifically about nails and those shows need to be made so he regularly puts on nail puppet shows in his basement where he keeps a collection of rare baseball cards from when baseball cards were considered the thing to collect and he had them all incased in these glass jars the size of basketballs that he said were given to him by a traveling witch who rode on a giant cart made of clay being driven by horses that were going insane and talking to each other about salads from a place off of highway 17 where salads are made with the leaves of lettuce farmed in the valleys of an enchanted field where once harvested the harvesters have visions of God crying while blowing up a big balloon that is made of baloney skin and old tires from the cars made by beings of a planet that is approximately 537845697234 light years away from Earth where the beings throw constant parties where they celebrate making hot dogs with demons who claim that the people of Earth will love hot dogs and that hot dogs will be a pretty good way to control people's minds and then it all happened [Hook] Uh uh uuuh uh uh uuh hot dog meat tastes weird huh uh uh uh hot dog meat tastes super weird like salty meat tubes made of God's tears uh uh uh uuuuuh God cried and then the demons they came and collected uh uh made hot dogs out of the tears of the lord and sold them on the streets [Pre-Chorus] Oh whoa whoa oh whoa whoaa whoa thiis iiiss the the greeaaatesst great greatest song gung sonungal song youb you haaave ebbber listuned toou tube hats in the rain
