[Intro] The sun slid off the parking lot I had a craving, nothing more [Verse 1] I crossed the lot as daylight thinned My claws were clean, my coat was neat The Dairy Queen sign blinked above I pushed the door with careful feet The bell went ding; the room went still A spoon fell down, a child said, “Mom—” I saw the menu, found my choice “Vanilla cone. With sprinkles. Please.” [Pre-Chorus] They backed away, they dropped their trays I checked my face for something strange Was it the fur? The fangs? The tail? I only came for ice cream, friends [Chorus] I’m the Chupacabra, standing by the case Everybody’s screaming; I just want a taste Vanilla cone, sprinkles on the top Why’d you all run when I said, “Please don’t drop it”? I’m the Chupacabra, puzzled and polite I came for a little treat before the night [Verse 2] The cashier slid it on the counter Then ducked behind the register I held my claws up, nice and slow “Hey, I’m not here to cause a stir.” A man climbed halfway up a booth A kid hid underneath a chair I licked the cone; the room stayed frozen I said, “It’s good. You want a share?” [Pre-Chorus] They backed away, they dropped their trays I checked my breath; I’d brushed today Was it the horns? The glowing eyes? I only came for sprinkles, guys [Chorus] I’m the Chupacabra, standing by the case Everybody’s screaming; I just want a taste Vanilla cone, sprinkles on the top Why’d you all run when I said, “Please don’t drop it”? I’m the Chupacabra, puzzled and polite I came for a little treat before the night [Bridge] The manager emerged with trembling hands I asked if they had napkins, too He tossed the whole box from across the room I said, “That’s kind. I’ll just take two.” Then someone shouted, “Monster!”—I sighed And checked the cone for melting sides [Final Chorus] I’m the Chupacabra, standing by the case Everybody’s screaming; I just want a taste Vanilla cone, sprinkles on the top I paid in cash—why’d you all run when I said, “Please don’t drop it”? I’m the Chupacabra, puzzled and polite Next time I’ll order through the drive-thru tonight [Outro] One vanilla cone. Extra sprinkles. Receipt says “Have a nice night.” I think they meant it.
