[Intro] [Dramatic, dark atmospheric sequence with bubble sounds] [Deep, booming, operatic male voice clears throat] Ahem. For ten thousand years, the rumors fly, But nobody ever stops to ask... why? [Vocal Drop] [Punchy 'legend uh uh uh na na' hook loop begins] [Massive, upbeat 90s Eurodance club beat explodes] [Bright synths, energetic dance rhythm] Legend uh uh uh na na! Legend uh uh uh na na! [Verse 1] [Flamboyant, rhythmic deep baritone vocals] They write their little books, they take their blurry shots, They map out the highlands and all the tourist spots. But every single headline makes me roll my eyes, "The Lady of the Lake" is a historical lie! I'm polyglot, worldly, I jet-set around, But every time I surface, it never fails, someone with camera in hand! It gets a bit irritating being constantly tracked, When I'm just trying to stay cheerful, and that is a fact! [Pre-Chorus] [Build-up, clapping beat, rising energy] Why do they always call me "she"? As if they define my pronouns for me! [Music stops completely, dead silence] [Dripping with sarcasm, deadpan spoken word] What gave it away? I need to declare— Was it the long flowing hair, or the bikini I wear?! [Vocal Drop] Legend uh uh uh na na! [Chorus] [Anthemic club pop, huge catchy synth hook] [Upfront, confident masculine vocals] I’m Nessie! The King of the Deep! I’m Nessie! These secrets I keep! I’m a stallion of the loch, I’m a masterpiece man, Catch me in my speedo if you think that you can! Yeah, I’ve got the power, I’ve got the stride— Stop calling me "she," I’m a legend with pride! [Post-Chorus] [High energy dance breakdown, heavy synth hook line] Legend uh uh uh na na! Legend uh uh uh na na! [Verse 2] [Sassy dance-pop delivery, deep voice bouncing with the beat] They sell soft plushies in the souvenir shop, With a cute pink bow right on the top. Honey, please! Look at this chest, look at this chin, I travel the globe, speak every language with skill! Bonjour, und Guten Tag, I can speak them all fine, But I'm back in the deep water just living my best life. I bumped into a ship just the other dark night, A tiny misunderstanding, why all the drama? I've never hurt a soul, it was just a gentle nudge, Why do these captain fellows hold a terrible grudge? [Pre-Chorus] [Build-up, building drum snare roll] [A cappella vocal echo] Legend uh uh uh na na... [Bridge] [Beat drops out to a pulsing bassline, theatrical emotional spoken word] [Deep, dramatic, lonely tone] And don't get me started on my personal life. I found someone special, she’s my whole world. A gorgeous whale shark, absolute stunner from the start, But she's not looking for commitment, and it breaks my heart. She wants to stay single, keep her options open, So it's just a bit lonely down here under the sea... [Final Chorus] [Explosive final drop, high-energy maximum dance party vibe] I’m Nessie! The King of the Deep! I’m Nessie! These secrets I keep! I’m a stallion of the loch, I’m a masterpiece man, Catch me in my speedo if you think that you can! Yeah, I’ve got the power, I’ve got the stride— Stop calling me "she," I’m a titan with pride! [Outro] [Beat starts to fade, underwater echo effects] Long flowing hair... Polka dot bikini... Just a tiny misunderstanding, darling. [Deep laughing chuckle] Legend uh uh uh na na... Au revoir! [Big splash sound] [Fade to silence]
