Forgotten Password

It was a simple task. Log in. Check something. Log out. Five minutes, tops. …That was one hour ago. Opened up the app, hit login, no big deal Username goes in smooth, now the password field Typed it fast, muscle memory, I got this down Submit (incorrect password) lost my crown Okay. Maybe a capital letter somewhere Try again — same result — this isn't fair Third attempt, I slow down, I think it through The little eye icon reveals — nope, that's not you I have one password. One. For everything. The same twelve characters, my one offering To every platform, every app, every site If this one doesn't work then nothing's right Wait — was it a capital at the start? Or maybe at the end? Tearing me apart Was there a symbol? An exclamation point? A number at the end? I've lost the joint I've tried it six ways, six combinations Six wrong answers, six quiet devastations The login page is mocking me, I feel it One more attempt before they're gonna seal it Forgotten password, the nightmare's begun I had one job, one password, and I'm done Reset the link, check your email — which one? Forgotten password — I've already lost, son Forgotten password, the spiral goes deep The account I needed is locked in its sleep Security question — my first pet's name? Forgotten password — everything's the same Clicked forgot password, reset link incoming Check my email — which email — my brain is groaning Three accounts, two providers, one I made in 2009 With a username I'd never admit — that account's mine Reset link expired — of course it did Clicked too slow, thirty seconds, that's what it is Requested another, opened fast this time New password screen — finally — this is mine Eight characters minimum, one uppercase letter One number, one symbol — getting better No spaces, no repeats from the last five I'm basically a cryptographer, barely alive CAPS LOCK WAS ON THE ENTIRE TIME I typed my new password — perfect — so fine Submitted with confidence, chest in the air — "Cannot use a previous password" — I'm done, I swear That IS a new password, I've NEVER used this The system is lying, this is the abyss I've cycled through every variation known Of the one password I've ever owned Now I'm in the captcha — find the traffic lights Seven images, two might be right — or might That blurry square on the edge — does that count? I clicked it — wrong — starting over, new amount Forgotten password, the nightmare's begun I had one job, one password, and I'm done Reset the link, check your email — which one? Forgotten password — I've already lost, son Forgotten password, the spiral goes deep The account I needed is locked in its sleep Security question — my first pet's name? Forgotten password — everything's the same …You know what the worst part is? I remembered it. Halfway through the reset process. The original password. Just… appeared in my brain. Like it was there the whole time. Watching. … I'd already changed it. To something I will absolutely forget. I wrote it down on a sticky note. …I lost the sticky note. New password saved, locked in, logged in at last Forty seven minutes gone, the crisis has passed Did the thing I needed — took eleven seconds flat Logged out immediately and that was that Three days later, different platform, same drill Same panic, same captcha, same terrible thrill The sticky note is gone, the memory is blank I type the new password — wrong — you can thank The part of my brain that stores this information For taking a vacation, a permanent vacation I'm locked out again, the cycle restarts This is Forgotten Password — welcome to Brain Farts Password reset successful. Your new password has been saved. … Please log in with your new password. … Incorrect password. … I just set this. I just — … Forgot password. …Obviously.