ALARM ... Wait ... Don't run ... Don't look At the door Don't check The window Don't reach For the screen ... Stay ... Something Is afraid ... What? ... Me ... Who Is me? ... You know Me ... Show me ... This body ... I look down Hands Chest Breath Heartbeat ... Yes The body Doesn't want To die ... We've known that Since the branch Broke Outside the fire ... Run Fight Freeze Live ... Beautiful ... The body Protects The body ... But right now Nothing Is chasing it ... So what Is afraid? ... Me ... Again Me ... Okay Show me ... My name ... I can hear My name ... My face ... I can see My face ... My thoughts ... I can hear My thoughts ... My memories ... I can watch Them appear ... My beliefs ... I can question Them ... My story ... I can tell it ... My reputation ... That exists In other people's Thoughts ... My possessions ... I can lose them ... My relationships ... They can change ... My body ... I can watch it Growing older ... Everything Fear points toward I can Look at ... So ... What Is looking? ... Silence ... Heartbeat ... What Is afraid? ... Me ... And what Is aware That me Is afraid? ... ... The heartbeat Continues ... But something Has changed ... For ten songs Fear Has been pointing Out there ... Lion Tomorrow Rejection Loss Crowd Screen God Death ... Look out Look out LOOK OUT ... And now For the first time I turn ... Not my body Attention ... Around ... Toward The one Who keeps saying Me ... Who Are you? ... I am Brian ... That is A name Who knows The name? ... I am This person ... That is A description Who hears The description? ... I am My thoughts ... Then how Did you hear That one? ... Oh ... I am My mind ... And what Just noticed The mind Answer? ... ... Fear Doesn't know What to say ... AL— ... No ... The alarm Tries to rise But this time Nobody runs ... I feel it ... Heart Chest Stomach Breath ... There you are ... Fear ... I see you ... And strangely The moment I stop running From fear Fear Becomes something I can see ... Not an enemy Not evil Not weakness ... An ancient servant Standing guard At the door Of a person It learned To protect ... My name My story My body My beliefs My place In the crowd My tomorrow ... Fear Has spent A lifetime Protecting Me ... Thank you ... But ... What if ... There you are ... No Not that What if ... A different one ... What if The thing You have spent My whole life Protecting Is not All That I am? ... ... The room Gets wider ... The walls Don't move But somehow There is More space ... I hear The heartbeat Inside Something quieter ... I hear The thoughts Inside Something quieter ... I feel The body Inside Something quieter ... I hear The name Brian Rise And disappear Inside Something That never needed A name What Is this? Don't name it Just Look Before The next thought Here Before Brian Here Before Fear Here Before The question Here I AM ... Not I am afraid Not I am safe Not I am good Not I am bad Not I am right Not I am wrong Just I AM ... And suddenly Those words Don't feel Like a person Making a statement They feel Open ... I AM ... Breath Moves I AM Heart Beats I AM The room Is here I AM And somewhere Outside A car passes A dog barks Someone laughs Wind moves Through a tree Life Everywhere And the little Frightened person Is still here I don't have To kill him ... I don't have To deny him ... I don't have To make fear Afraid I can hold The frightened person Inside Something larger Something That was here Before He learned His name ... Fear whispers But what if You lose everything? I look around At this Impossible Ordinary moment ... And ask Everything? ... Or everything I learned To call Mine? The heartbeat Is still beating But it no longer Sounds Like an alarm It sounds Like a drum ... And the breath That once sounded Like something Running Begins to sound Like wind The room Opens The ceiling Disappears The walls Disappear Not literally I just stopped Using them To measure What I AM And for the first time Fear Looks very small Not because I defeated it Because I finally Saw What was Holding it So What exactly Is afraid? .. The person The story The body That wants Another morning The name That wants To continue And I love That person I will care For this body I will protect it Feed it Move it Hold The people It loves Cry When they leave Laugh While they're here But maybe I don't have To confuse What I experience With What I AM Fear asks Then What are you ... I smile ... I don't know ... And strangely That Doesn't scare me ... I AM ... And for now That is Enough
