[Intro] (It's only ten thirty in the morning and I'm drunk off my head, let's go for a drive!) [Verse one] It's a sunny morning on a Tuesday I'm drunk and want to go on a drive today Don't care who's in my way Don't care if I have Hell to pay [Verse two] I can't see properly and I can't drive straight I'm far too drunk to care about fate I'm at the wheel Drunk and dizzy is how I feel [Instrumental] [Bridge] I'm way over twenty miles per hour, over the speed limit Anyone who could try to stop me is a bloody tit I don't care, I'm drunk You're simply just a punk [Chorus] Drink driving fun Under this Tuesday morning sun Bugger, I ran over a dear old gran And some bloke named Dan [Instrumental] [Verse three] I ran over two people Drunk and on my way to Whitstable Drunk driving in my car I'm hammered but I'm going far [Bridge] Now the police are after me I'm too drunk to notice or even see I'm forced to pull over Lacking any composure [Chorus] Drink driving fun I'm being arrested under this Tuesday morning sun I have ruined many people's lives The guilt will surely stab me later like knives [Outro] [Spoken] (I'm going to prison for this, aren't I?)
