What I Used to Be

[intro] [sampling] (What I used to be...) (What I used to be...) [rap verse] Yo, the concrete breathed a bitter, urban sigh, back when Sunrise just meant another hustle, another lie I'd spin. Mama gone, the silence in the kitchen thick and vast, Daddy drowned his sorrows in a bottle built to last. Empty chair, empty promises, a hollow echo in the hall, Fell in with shadows, answering a darker, reckless call. Brick dust on my sneakers, the scent of stale bodega brew, Young and dumb, thought the crew I ran with, they were true. Petty scores, boosting jackets, the thrill a fleeting high, Didn't see the dead ends stretching out beneath a bruised sky. [sampling] (What I used to be...) (What I used to be...) [rap verse] Used to be that kid, quick to snap, quick to brawl, Clutching a rusty blade, answering anger's squall. The block was a chessboard, every corner a potential threat, Survival instinct kicking in, ain't shed a single sweat When the talk turned to burners, the weight cold in my palm, Thought I was hard, thought I was keeping myself from harm. Now I look back, see the fear behind the bravado's mask, A desperate youth grasping at shadows, a thankless task. The sticky fingers, the lookout shifts, the whispered, shady deals, Chasing ghosts in the darkness, the consequence it conceals. [sampling] (What I used to be...) (What I used to be...) [rap verse] Remember nights, the flickering streetlights painting grim scenes, Sharing cheap liquor, fueled by adolescent, broken dreams. The hollow laughter, the boasts that rang so thin and untrue, Each bad decision, another brick in the wall I built, me and the crew. The sirens wailing, a soundtrack to our misspent youth, Chasing fleeting highs, ignoring any lasting truth. Used to think the world owed me something, a twisted, selfish claim, Blind to the damage, the hurt, the ever-growing shame. Now the mirror shows a stranger, a ghost of what I'd be, If that path had kept on winding, eternally. [sampling] (What I used to be...) (What I used to be...) [rap verse] Shit, I was lost, a youngin' navigating murky tides, Where loyalty was currency, and violence often presides. The quick cash, the fleeting respect, the illusion of control, Digging my own grave, body and soul. My conscience, a whisper I chose not to heed, Planting seeds of regret, a bitter harvest indeed. That dude I was, impulsive, reckless, full of misplaced pride, A constant storm brewing deep inside. Now the autumn leaves fall, a mellow, golden hue, Reflecting on the past, the old and tainted view. [sampling] (What I used to be...) (What I used to be...) [rap verse] That ain't me no more, the anger, the haze, the gun, A different path I walk now, beneath a different sun. Still carrying the weight, the lessons etched in deep, But learning to breathe, learning new promises to keep. The past a shadow, a reminder of the brink, But the future's a canvas, and different colors I think I'll paint upon it, a testament to change, Leaving behind the wreckage, rearranging the range. [sampling] (What I used to be...) (What I used to be...) (What I used to be...) (What I used to be...) [outro]