I walked through the grass And my nose called quits Birches gave me hives Flowers did their little bit Bless their tiny petals Bless their leafy little lies I sneezed like a drumline Right in their surprised eyes And you said, "It's just spring" Okay, sure, that's cute My face said, "Absolutely not" (Absolutely not) I got a full-body reaction To the whole damn truth When the world gets pretty I get petty, and I boot I'm allergic to bullshit Yeah, that's the real thing Grass and birches and flowers All make my eyes sting I'm allergic to bullshit Say it with a straight face (Oh, what a shame) I'm allergic to bullshit And it comes in lace One sniff and I'm folding Like a lawn chair in June Every sweet little promise Turns sour by noon Your "it'll be fine" Got me wheezing on cue My patience gets hives When the story ain't true And you wave those excuses Like they mean anything Baby, save the perfume I can smell the sting I am not impressed By your polished little script Just cut to the part Where the truth finally slips I'm allergic to bullshit Yeah, that's the real thing Grass and birches and flowers All make my eyes sting I'm allergic to bullshit Say it with a straight face (Oh, what a shame) I'm allergic to bullshit And it comes in lace Oh, wow You really thought I'd buy that? (Yeah, no) (So brave) (So fake) I can handle pollen I can handle pain But feed me a lie And I break out in blame I'm allergic to bullshit It's my favorite fault Grass and birches and flowers Take a bow, take a halt I'm allergic to bullshit Ring the little alarm (Here we go) I'm allergic to bullshit And it comes with charm
