[intro] Gather 'round, dear friends, and lend me your ear, A tale of mischief and snot-filled fear! In a quaint little pharmacy, we sought some relief, But what happened next? A tale of pure grief! [verse 1] We strolled through the door, on a quest most absurd, To find a fine solvent; yes, that was our word. But the pharmacist sneered with a snotty remark, “Is it glue you desire, or just a good lark?” [chorus - emphatic] Oh, the snotty pharmacist, a true sight to see, With a sneeze that would cover both you and me! As Xander hid low, in his shell he did cower, And Oleg played tunes on the bell for an hour! [verse 2] We tried to explain as she sneezed with great force, But the snot flew around like a wild, raging horse. “Just give us the solvent!” we pleaded with flair, But she just kept sneezing, covering us everywhere! [hook] Oh, let this be a lesson, dear friends, heed my word, Never ask for assistance from someone disturbed. With a turtle and barbarian causing a scene, Our visit to the pharmacy turned quite obscene! [bridge - comedic pause] Oleg was laughing, ringing that bell, While Xander the monk hid, as if in a spell. Snot dripped like rain, a terrible sight, We knew in that moment, we’d not be polite! [chorus - powerful] Oh, the snotty pharmacist, a true sight to see, With a sneeze that would cover both you and me! As Xander hid low, in his shell he did cower, And Oleg played tunes on the bell for an hour! [outro] In the end, we were banned from that cursed old place, With snot on our clothes and a mess on our face. So heed this advice when you’re seeking some aid, Beware of the pharmacist who’s snotty and frayed! [final tag] Yes, beware of the pharmacist, sneezes abound, For you might leave the store feeling snot-covered and drowned!
