Jill Can’t Grind Beans (in the style of rViolent Femmes / rGone Daddy Gone) (Verse 1 – Suspenseful Start) Sun came up on the Boise scene, Paul One yellin’, “Where’s the caffeine?” Jill grabbed the grinder, things got mean, Whole beans flyin’ like a punk-rock dream! Ellen’s laughin’, Jennifer’s cryin’, Tom’s still nappin’—man, we’re tryin’. Paul Two’s preachin’ the coffee creed, But Jill, oh Jill, she can’t grind beans! (Chorus) 🎶 JILL CAN’T GRIND BEANS! (yeah-yeah-yeah!) We’re buzzin’ raw on Boise dreams! 🎶 JILL CAN’T GRIND BEANS! (wo-wo-wo!) Caffeine’s gone rogue, espresso no-go! (Verse 2 – The Adventure Builds) Walked the Greenbelt, took the squamous route, Blue-turf stadium made us shout! Ansots lunch—Ellie and Dan, Basque croquettes made us fans! Tom from Tempe, Ellen from Seattle, Jennifer gigglin’ in the saddle. Dave and Rose, we miss you bad, Fancy Freeze made Ellen glad! (Pre-Chorus) Scrumpy shots—cheen cheen! Basque delight, Kai show! Bai! We own the night! Mother Earth Nitro had us flyin’, Jill’s still grindin’—beans still defyin’! (Chorus 2) 🎶 JILL CAN’T GRIND BEANS! (what’s she doin’?!) We’re hummin’ loud on caffeine dreams! 🎶 JILL CAN’T GRIND BEANS! (someone help her!) That grinder’s smokin’, hear it scream! (Bridge – Surprise Rena Moment) Then outta the plaza, under string-light haze, Came Rena with a sax that set us ablaze. She’s scattin’ wild—ba-doo-ba-dee-bee! Paul One jumps in—ba-bop-ba-bee! Crowd goes nuts, Boise swings, Even Jill forgets about those beans! (Final Chorus – Chaotic Fade-Out) 🎶 JILL CAN’T GRIND BEANS! — we’re singin’, screamin’, laughin’ hard! 🎶 JILL CAN’T GRIND BEANS! — soundin’ like a coffee yard! 🎶 Rena’s scattin’, Tom’s snorin’, Ellen’s cheerin’, Dave and Rose adorin’! 🎶 Boise’s buzzin’, beans explodin’, and the song keeps overflowin’! (music collapses into joy and noise — hand claps, yells, and somebody shouting “cheen cheen!”)
