[Intro] It started with a breeze, a chill upon my back, A whisper from the autumn wind, a cozy little attack. I grabbed this sweater—warm, enough… And now I can’t take it off! [Verse] Mittens! Scarves! Layers upon layers! Boots that squeak, like frosty little players! Coat on coat, till I’m shaped like a sphere, Can’t bend my elbows but I’ve got winter cheer! [Pre-Chorus] I tried once to shed it— But the static sparks flew wild! It clung to me, hugged to me, Like a fleece-obsessed child! [Chorus] This could be the sweater I’ll never take off! Not for sun, nor for rain, nor a cough! Through the blizzards, the parties, the shopping mall fights, This sweater is my armor on the coldest of nights! [Refrain] “ba-da-da-DAH, ohhh-ahhh!” [Verse 2] I once wore six scarves, they strangled my song— Three coats at once, still froze all along! But your sweater, your sweater, it stands above all, The knitted, committed, unremovable shawl! [Bridge] It smells faintly of cocoa, of cinnamon dreams… Though I’ve worn it for weeks, ignored the dry-clean. It’s become part of me, like a skin made of thread… Try to remove it—I’ll fight you instead! [Final Chorus] It’s the sweater we’ll never take off! It’s a blanket, a fortress, a trough— For our secrets, our crumbs, and our tears from the frost, Once you’ve put it on, baby, you’re never lost! [Refrain] “la-la-la, doo-wah-doo-wah, hey-yaaa!” [Outro] Yes, this sweater, oh this sweater, It’s absurd but it’s better… It’s the SWEATER I’LL NEVER TAKE OFF! “ahhh!”
