Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the Bald Men's Choir of Illinois! Stop calling us Jeff Bezos We don't look anything alike Appreciate it if you wouldn't stare Is it just because our lack of hair? I am a union representative So this is highly offensive to me I don't stop paying people If they take a break to pee Please cut it out with the nickname It's not funny or cute! (A shame!) We have to wear nametags, So you'll use our actual names (That our dear mother's gave to us!) Stop calling us Jeff Bezos We don't look anything alike Appreciate it if you wouldn't stare Is it just because our lack of hair? I've never crushed a local bookstore I've never gone to space just to flex My face is an entirely different shape So stop calling me Jeff during sex! You're wondering why toupee's are back Is it insecurity, mayhaps? No, it's so you assholes won't confuse us With that warehouse owning hack! Oh doctor, doctor, tell me true Is my scalp a curse from the heavens? Am I destined to be mistaken for the CEO Of a capitalist empire, forever?! Stop calling us Jeff Bezos We don't look anything alike Appreciate it if you wouldn't stare Is it just because our lack of hair? We tried We really did But no matter what we said The world still saw us as Bezos So we made a decision for us all If we must be Jeff Bezos Then Jeff Bezos must fall! We bought shares in fetish sites Indeed for a massive sum We sold alligators to Florida And demanded to be paid in cum! (Your move, Jeff!) It's working! (It's working!) Oh it's working! Jeff just saw a video of us In the sewer twerking! He released a statement saying: (What is this about then? I Am in no way affiliated with these men!) Do you idiots understand now!? Stop calling us Jeff Bezos We don't look anything alike Appreciate it if you wouldn't stare Is it just because our lack of hair?