[Verse 1] I was sittin’ on the porch with my dog named Lou When a shiny silver frisbee zipped across the view Lou barked once, I blinked twice, thought my eyes were playin’ tricks Then a beam of light lit up my yard like some cosmic Netflix [Chorus] Oh, it’s a U‑A‑P, floatin’ over me Lookin’ like it wants to join the barbecue for free If you’re here to probe my secrets, buddy, take a number please ’Cause my ex already tried that back in 2013 [Verse 2] Out steps a little green guy with a clipboard in his hand Says, “Relax, we’re just tourists, we’re new to your land” He asked for directions to the nearest Dairy Queen Guess even aliens crave soft‑serve when they’re feelin’ kinda green [Chorus] Yeah, it’s a U‑A‑P, hoverin’ by a tree Tryin’ to understand why humans watch reality TV If you’re here to steal our cows, at least leave us the cheese ’Cause nachos just ain’t nachos without dairy expertise [Bridge] They said, “We’ve traveled light‑years, crossed galaxies wide But your traffic on the freeway? Man, we’d rather walk outside” Then they offered me a ride, said, “Hop in if you dare” But I’ve seen enough sci‑fi to know I ain’t goin’ up there [Guitar Solo] [Final Chorus] So if a U‑A‑P comes driftin’ down your street Offer them a soda and a comfy place to seat They might teach you cosmic secrets or just ask for mac and cheese ’Cause even interstellar travelers got simple earthly needs [Guitar solo]
