1 — So stick a vacumn in my fetal head Paint the nursery hospital-red Let the angels piss the bed Let the lullaby wake the dead I was born where the maggots fed To a mother with a messed up head and a Father gone after mom was bred Now hear I am With a halo full of dread Verse 2 — So suck out my prenatal brains Run them laughing through the drains Hang my hope up by its chains Sell my name for spare remains I got baptized in migraine rains Fed glass milk and windowpanes Raised by wolves in human stains Taught that love only arrives in pains Verse 3 Just put me in a kennel Broadcast static through the channel Dress my grief in cheap flannel Make my god a broken panel Tie my teeth up with a handle Light my prayers like a candle Feed my dreams through the channel Leave my soul inside the kennel And feed me euthanasia Kiss me numb with sweet amnesia Call my panic anesthesia Turn my childhood to aphasia I was raised on dead fantasia Plastic saints and pink dysplasia God looked down with social amnesia While they spoon-fed me euthanasia Pre-Chorus — Let me lick you one last time While the church bells choke on grime While the nursery starts to climb Up the walls in a nursery rhyme I was innocent of the crime but I was punished all the time someone always crossed the line And then convince me I was fine My birth was a mistake But I’m still breathing through the break You can spit on what you made You can curse the skin I take My birth was a mistake But I won’t kneel inside your ache I was born beneath the blade Now I bloom inside the scrape I’m not the thing you threw away I’m not the debt you made me pay I’m not the dog you couldn’t save I’m what crawled out of the grave Verse 5 — And then stick me in the freezer Tell the priest I was a teaser Tell the nurse I was a seizure Tell the mirror I’m a pleaser Wrap my ribs in rotten leisure Cut my pulse down, heavy breather Make my pain your disco fever Then preserve me in the freezer Verse 6 — Depress my nervous system Make the screaming quantum wisdom Make the family court a kingdom Make the saints applaud the victim Wire my spine into the system Turn my symptoms into rhythm Tell the ghosts I never kissed them Then depress my nervous system Till this bullshit worlds a blur And stuff my lifeless fur Call me pet, but not for her Make my heartbeat beg and purr Drain out all my fucking fluids Till the bathtub starts to stir Tell the butcher I was pure Then stuff my lifeless fur Verse 8 — You have taken all you needed Watched me crawl while you proceeded Called me sick when I conceded Called me healed when I receded Every warning went unheeded Every mercy came defeated Every mouth that smiled, feeded On the parts of me you needed And you fucked me all you pleased While I begged on broken knees While the walls coughed up disease While the lights began to freeze I was trained to say please I was chained to your degrees I was carved to fit your keys And you fucked me all you pleased Pre-Chorus 2 — You built me out of bone Then left me there alone You made my ribs a throne Then burned me to the stone You taught my mouth to moan Then punished every tone You fed me from a phone Then swore I died unknown Chorus — bigger My birth was a mistake But I’m still breathing through the break You can spit on what you made You can curse the skin I take My birth was a mistake But I won’t kneel inside your ache I was born beneath the blade Now I bloom inside the scrape I’m not the thing you threw away I’m not the thing you threw away I’m not the debt you made me pay I’m not the dog you couldn’t save I’m what crawled out of the grave Bridge — You named me something you could use Then called my hunger proof of abuse You poured your poison in the juice Then tied my childhood to a noose I was the wound beneath the bruise The orphaned nerve, the blown-out fuse The holy thing you got to use The walking corpse you couldn’t choose You lit my crib up with bad news You dressed my prayers in dead shoes You made my love of self-abuse Then acted shocked when I refused Breakdown — I am not your mistake I am not your mistake I am not your mistake I am the thing you couldn’t break I am not your mistake I am not your mistake I am not your mistake I am the scar that learned to wake My birth was a mistake But I’m still breathing through the break You can spit on what you made You can curse the skin I take My birth was a mistake But I won’t kneel inside your ache I was born beneath the blade Now I bloom inside the scrape I’m not
