No Edits

I wrote it three times. First one sounded angry. Second one sounded reasonable which was worse. Third one said “No worries.” Deleted that one first. I’ve gotten very good at making the truth convenient. Taking out the sharp parts. Moving the blame around so nobody has to hold it too long. Changing “That hurt me” into “I understand.” I do understand. That’s not the same thing. There was a version where I apologized. For reacting. For noticing. For making the room uncomfortable after somebody else made me uncomfortable first. Read it back. Deleted that too. So here plain text. No softer wording. No little joke at the end so you know I’m still easy to be around. I cared. You mattered. What happened hurt. All three can be true. My finger’s over send. Funny. Whole body acting like I’m about to jump off something. It’s a message. That’s all. Just a message. Send. No edits. No cleaner version. No making myself smaller so the sentence fits. I meant what I said. I meant what I said No edits no Still here. Good. Next time maybe it won’t take three drafts.