[Intro – spoken, Jamaican quest giver] Ey mon… welcome to de 12 Guys Rust server. You can learn how to grow tobacco… you can learn how to mix de sacred snus… …but first you gotta work with that crazy Swedish man Sven. And trust me mon… dis man smell like fish, rust, and bad life choices. But if you survive it… you get the recipe. Alright… dis how it goes… [Verse 1] At first I logged in, minding my base Then Sven Svensson appeared in my face He said “Listen friend, your destiny begins We must craft the sacred snus of kings!” First he wants some Grön Glöd leaf Growing in hemp like Swedish reef He sniffs the plant and nods real slow “If this fails… we use potato flakes you know.” [Pre-Chorus] Then fog rolls in and Sven just sighs “Now we need leaves that make Vikings cry” [Chorus] Oh no, not again That weird old Swede named Sven Grow the leaf Dry the leaf Put the pouch beneath your lip Salt and smoke Rust and fire This man’s got a nicotine empire Oh yeah… I will Snusvive [Verse 2] Next he wants the Fog Leaf blend Growing where sad campfires end He says it gives the stoic stare And the “ancient Swedish thousand yard glare” Then comes Iron Leaf from the desert sand “Tastes like steel!” says the crazy man Smells like rust and bad regret And that thing you did you won’t forget [Chorus] Oh no, here we go Sven’s electric furnace show Burn the leaf Dry it black Ancestors screaming from the stack Salt and smoke Rust and fire That furnace sounds like a dying elk choir Oh yeah… I will Snusvive [Verse 3] Now he’s mixing blends like a mad chef king “Golden River!” he proudly sings Add some pastry, salt and pride “Flavor must flow like a Swedish tide” Then Grovsnus comes, thick and crude With oil inside that probably shouldn’t He says with a grin and Viking grace “Real men like flavor that punches the face.” [Disco Breakdown] Tram grease… Salt again… Anchors… glue… Sven what the hell are we doing here, man?! Gunpowder… mustache hair… Pirate rum from who knows where Somebody stop this Swedish dude Before he invents diesel flavored snus! [Final Chorus] But somehow we made it to the end Through rust and salt and crazy Sven Mix the leaf Seal the tin This final blend might break your grin The 12G Snus, the legend brew Sven says “Valhalla might blink at you!” Oh yeah… We Snusvived [Outro – spoken Jamaican quest giver] And just like that mon… you did it. You learned how to grow tobacco… you learned how to mix the snus… And best of all? You never… EVER… have to talk to that weird Swedish man Sven again. Unless he starts another quest. … Which he probably will. Now go enjoy your snus mon. And maybe open a window… because that stuff smell terrible. disco fade out 🕺
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