『私は姫女"怨"だったかもしれない』 ★ (Remastered)

『私は姫女"怨"だったかもしれない』 [Intro - Narration] 小学校の理科の時間に 「ハルジョオンは春のお花」と教わった それがずっと私の名前だった [Verse 1 - Monologue] 教科書やかるたでは 「ルリタテハは蝶の仲間です」 「コスモスは秋の桜です」 「エゾハルゼミはヨーキンヨーキンケケケケクと鳴く」 そんなことも一緒に覚えた [Pre-Chorus - Questioning] 「蛾と蝶の違いは、羽が畳めるかどうか」って言ってたけど 今ではそれも曖昧らしい 理科室の箱庭で 暗い箱から芽を伸ばす種子を見て 植物も生きてるって思った [Chorus - Realization] 稚魚が食べられていく映像を見て 泣きそうになった そして気づいてしまった 「声を上げる命」だけが守られているってことに [Verse 2 - Confrontation] クジラは賢いから守れ？ 牛や豚は食べてもいい？ 植物は切っても痛まない？ 誰が決めたのかな、それ お金かな？ なんかの宗教かな？ 人間様の都合かな？ [Bridge - Despair & Identity Crisis] じゃあ、私は？ 私の名前は？ 私の痛みは？ 咲いても咲いても 名前を間違えられた 咲いても咲いても 誰かの記憶違いの中で咲かされた 私は春紫苑だったのか 姫女苑だったのか もしかしたら 「姫女怨？」 わからなくなってきたけど [Break - Shifting Perspective] それでも私は咲いた 夏の道路脇で 何も知らずに笑ってた [Verse 3 - External Examples] 金鶏菊ちゃんは 「咲かないでください」って言われたって ただ太陽に向かって立ってただけ 葛や蔦の名を持つ蔓ちゃんたちは 海外で“モンスタープラント”なんて呼ばれてるらしいよ 「虫がいないから抑えがきかない」って でもそれ、蔓ちゃんたちのせいじゃないよね？ [Bridge 2 - Deeper Questioning] 誰がどこから連れてきて 誰が育てて 誰が責任を手放したの？ そして誰が分類したの？ 帰化／外来／害草／侵略／家畜／野生 声を持たない命に 勝手に名を与えて 勝手に裁いて ほんとに、それでいいの？ [Chorus - Resignation & Acceptance] ──私は、姫女怨だったんだね でも、 私の春は、 私のものだから [Outro - Affirmation] 咲いた季節がちがっても 名前がちがっても 私は私で ここに咲いたんだ [Ending-Revelation] 私は姫女怨で良い… 私は『姫』『女』『怨』ーー ん～ん～ん〜ん〜 [English] 📝 Translator’s Notes: Harushi-on (春紫苑): Correct name of a spring-blooming flower, often mispronounced or confused with Himejo-on (姫女苑). Himejo-on (姫女苑): A summer-flowering weed, commonly seen on Japanese roadsides. 怨: A word meaning "grudge" or "resentment"—used here as a poetic twist on mistaken identity and quiet anger. Tickseed (金鶏菊) and Kudzu/Ivy: Real plants labeled as invasive in some regions, reflecting how classification and control often come from outside forces. Title:I Might Have Been Himejo“怨”— An identity in bloom [Intro – Narration] In a grade school science class, they told us: “Harujō-on is a spring flower.” That name stayed with me for years. (Note: The teacher likely meant Harushi-on – 春紫苑 – but mistakenly called it by the name of Himejo-on, a different flower. That misnaming became personal.) [Verse 1 – Memory] In textbooks and learning cards, I remember: "The Blue Admiral is a kind of butterfly." "Cosmos is the cherry blossom of autumn." "The Ezoharu cicada sings: Yo-kin yo-kin ke-ke-ke-ke-ku." [Pre-Chorus – Questioning] They said: “Butterflies fold their wings. Moths don’t.” But now, even that rule seems to blur. In the terrarium, I saw a seed sprouting in darkness, stretching toward a hole of light. I thought: even plants are alive. [Chorus – Realization] I saw young fish— devoured one after another. And I nearly cried. Because I realized: Only lives that cry out get protected. [Verse 2 – Confrontation] Whales are smart, so protect them? Cows and pigs are fine to eat? Plants feel no pain when cut? Who made that judgment? Was it money? Some faith? Just the convenience of humans? [Bridge – Identity Crisis] Then what about me? What is my name? What is my pain? I bloomed and bloomed— yet always misnamed. I bloomed and bloomed— but only in someone else's memory. Was I Harushi-on (春紫苑)? Was I Himejō-on (姫女苑)? Or maybe… Himejo怨? I don’t even know anymore. [Break – Perspective Shift] Still, I bloomed. By the roadside in summer, smiling, not knowing a thing. [Verse 3 – Parallels] Tickseed girl (Kin-gikyoku) was told: “Please don’t bloom here.” But she was only reaching toward the sun. The vine girls— kudzu and ivy— are called monster plants overseas. “There are no bugs to control them,” they say. But is that… really their fault? [Bridge 2 – Deeper Questioning] Who brought them there? Who planted them? Who gave up the responsibility? And who decided these labels? Naturalized / Alien / Noxious / Invasive / Livestock / Wild They gave names to voiceless lives. Then judged them. Without listening. Is that really okay? [Chorus – Acceptance] Yes… Maybe I was Himejo怨 all along. But even so, My spring is mine alone. [Outro – Affirmation] Even if I bloomed in the wrong season, Even if my name was never right— I was me, And I bloomed, Right here. [Ending – Revelation] I’m fine being Himejo怨. I am Hime. I am Jo. I am 怨. Mmm… Mmm… Mmm… Mmm…