(Intro) (Chorus) Rules of Acquisition, the Ferengi code. It’s the Keys to profit that they hold, Latinum in our hearts, these rules we uphold. Get your profit on lock, make your hustle rock, Here are the rules, here you go. Know them like the swoop of you lobes. Remember them all, all Two hundred and eighty five. (Verse 1) Rule Number 1 Once you have their money, you never give it back. Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to. Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity. Keep your ears open. Opportunity plus instinct equals profit. Greed is eternal. A deal is a deal. A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all. A contract, is a contract, is a contract... but only between Ferengi. (Chorus) (Verse 2) Rule Twenty One Never place friendship above profit. A wise man can hear profit in the wind. Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother… It never hurts to suck up to the boss… War is good for business. Peace is good for business. Don't trust a man wearing a suit better than your own. The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife. Good customers are as rare as latinum. Treasure them. Free advice is seldom cheap. The riskier the road, the greater the profit. A contract, is a contract, is a contract... but only between Ferengi. (Chorus) (Verse 3) Rule of Acquisition number seventy five. Home is where the heart is, but the stars are made of latinum. Every once in a while, declare peace; it confuses the hell out of your enemy. Nature decays, but latinum lasts forever. Sleep can interfere with… Proft, perhaps Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack. Treat people in your debt like family... exploit them. Never have sex with the boss's sister. Wives serve, brothers inherit. It's always good business to know about new customers before they walk in your door. Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success... don't hesitate to step on them. Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach. A contract, is a contract, is a contract... but only between Ferengi. (Chorus) (Verse 4) You can't free a fish from water. Never be afraid to mislabel a product. Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for latinum. No good deed ever goes unpunished. No good deed ever goes unpunished. … No good deed ever goes unpunished. (Outro) Ferengi pride, We hustle and grind, let the profits ride. Follow rules rules, and you'll be profit-in, The Ferengi way, let the latinum flow, get paid! … No good deed ever goes unpunished. … No good deed ever goes unpunished. …Once you have their money, you never give it back. …Once you have their money, you never give it back. …Once you have their money, you never give it back. (Verse 2) Rule Twenty One Never place friendship above profit. A wise man can hear profit in the wind. Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother… It never hurts to suck up to the boss… War is good for business. Peace is good for business. Don't trust a man wearing a suit better than your own. The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife. Good customers are as rare as latinum. Treasure them. Free advice is seldom cheap. The riskier the road, the greater the profit. A contract, is a contract, is a contract... but only between Ferengi. Rules of Acquisition, the Ferengi code. It’s the Keys to profit that they hold, Latinum in our hearts, these rules we uphold. Get your profit on lock, make your hustle rock, Here are the rules, Know them like the swoop of you lobes. Remember them all, and you would be wise. Remember them all, all Two hundred and eighty five. (Verse 3) Rule of Acquisition number seventy five. Home is where the heart is, but the stars are made of latinum. Every once in a while, declare peace; to confuse the hell out of your enemies. Nature decays, but latinum lasts forever. Sleep can interfere with… Profits, …perhaps? Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack. Treat people in your debt like family... exploit them. Never have sex with the boss's sister. Wives serve,… brothers inherit. It's always good business to know about new customers before they walk in your door. Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success... don't hesitate to step on them. Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach. A contract, is a contract, is a contract... but only between Ferengi. Rules of Acquisition, the Ferengi code. It’s the Keys to profit that they hold, Latinum in our hearts, these rules we uphold. Get your profit on lock, make your hustle rock, Here are the rules, Know them like the swoop of you lobes. Remember them all, and you would be wise. Remember them all, all Two hundred and eighty five. (Verse 4) You can't free a fish from water. Never be afraid to mislabel a product. Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for latinum. No good deed ever goes unpunished. No good deed ever goes unpunished. … No good deed ever goes unpunished. (Outro) Ferengi pride, We hustle and grind, let the profits ride. Follow the rules , and you'll be profit-in, The Ferengi way, let the latinum flow, get paid! … No good deed ever goes unpunished. … No good deed ever goes unpunished. …Once you have their money, you never give it back. …Once you have their money, you never give it back. …Once you have their money, you never give it back. A contract, is a contract, is a contract... A contract, is a contract, is a contract... A contract, is a contract, is a contract... but only between Ferengi. …Once you have their money, you never give it back.
