[Verse 1] I wish there was a way to get you to understand what its like to be me Even briefly jus so you could really see me Since i cant these lyrics show everyone small bits and pieces I write all my own shit spills right out my head before I even know what its gonna say No voices singing in my head have to have a beat in my ear And my thumbs jus moves without any cares Intuition ripping my soul bare Emotions screaming causes me days of fear If I don't give place to go it sits and festers Carbonated knots twist and turn wishing it would end Still not willing to look for a new chemical burn Veins been screaming telling me jus give up its my turn Motherfucker if I give you 1 itll turn to 2 to eternity That life ain't nothing new to me I got away I wont go back no matter how bad I need the relief My worst day sober or jus smoking weed Still cant touch the worst day addiction has shown me 8 years clean still dealing with some trauma from the places ive been [Chorus] Finding a way Till the eastern sky turns night to day Black to grey Till the shades break and fade away Finding a way Through another night I couldn't escape Wide awake Till sleep takes me away Till moonrise I'll be finding a way [Instrumental] [Verse 2] I got spatial awareness in the void Consciousness floating through an open mind Hanging out in there helps sometimes Sometimes it doesn't and I still wanna cry but cant Bubbles in my chest till it digs a pit and I fall right in Falling in emotions till I cant take it anymore Autopilot in the isle work flys by while im day dreaming Blank stare feeling my emotions screaming Stuck in it for hours wish it was fleeting Half the time I wish I didnt have to be me Shadows in the corner grinning planning and skeeming I need to sit down and close my eyes so I can see them Mirror of the mind reflecting all my demons Realizing Its me and the demons are my feelings Shouldn't of knocked on so many tombstones They were burried till I woke them now they scream till im mentally broken lately the graveyard scares me I need to go back and finish what I started Lay em back to rest Till the day comes I need the knowledge that they kept [Chorus] Finding a way Till the eastern sky turns night to day Black to grey Till the shades break and fade away Finding a way Through the feelings that I couldn't explain Wide awake Till sleep takes me away Till moonrise I'll be finding a way [Instrumental Break] [Verse 3 - Reflective] We only get fleeting moments of happiness In this sea of sadness we call reality So if sadness is whats perpetual Would death really be a permanent solution for a temporary problem Or the solution for a permanent problem We only get brief moments of relif From who fucking knows I dont But im gonna keep going walking the unknown This is jus who I am If I lost my depression I probably wouldnt know what to do [Beat Builds] Existential contemplation smoking a chronic bowl Till I shrug my shoulders and fold my knees to the floor Mudra on the hands breathing deep and consistent Ill sit there for hours sometimes even forget what I was doing Even forget that im human Body melts and awarness is all I am [Outro - Sparse] If my body's in a pitch black room Where does the bright white room come from
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