Title: MEET THE BOYS [Spoken Intro] What’s up Red Rock!? Alright, before we get started with this thing… You’re gonna hear a lotta names tonight. So we figured we oughta introduce everybody. There’s four of us. And somehow… This is all Nate’s fault. [Band kicks in] [Verse 1 — The Singer] First there’s me, I’m the old man here Got kids at home and I’m past my prime years I’m an outta-shape, in-shape Mexican dad Depending on the week and the dinner I had I knew Nate first, way back before These other two idiots came through the door Then gaming brought some strangers through And somehow Nate said, “You’ll like these dudes” Now years have passed and here we are Still stayin’ up way too late by far I’ve met Esh once, shook his hand— Landry? [Band stops] Still not convinced he’s a real man. [Band kicks back in] [Chorus] So meet the boys! Come on, settle on in Four grown men actin’ like kids again Different lives Different sides of the land All brought together by a controller in our hands We’ve talked some shit We’ve lost some sleep Made promises to get off that we never could keep And if tonight’s songs don’t make any sense— Just remember one thing: BLAME NATE FOR THIS! [Instrumental] [Verse 2 — Nate] Then there’s Nate, our Navy man An officer now with a wedding band Married Ashley, she’s Navy too So apparently one sailor just wouldn’t do Played college baseball back in the day Could hit a ball, but lost his hair along the way Started goin’ bald back in high school halls God took his hair but gave him— [pause] Well… baseball. [Crowd laughter] But back in COVID, give that man a gun Call of Duty Nate was second to none Last one alive? We knew our fate— “Everybody shut the hell up… LET NATE COOK.” He’d clutch that round, bring home the win Then lose the next one and put his fist through somethin’ [Band stops] That’s Nate. [Guitar resumes] [Verse 3 — Esh] Then there’s David, but we call him Esh Way up northwest where the air stays fresh Washington State, where the cold winds blow So naturally we decided he’s an Eskimo Lives in an igloo, hunts whales for food At least that’s the story we tell the dude Used to be online damn near every night Now his work schedule’s harder to find than Bigfoot in daylight Every now and then that green light shines And Esh comes crawlin’ back online Marks the worst drop point that he possibly can— What’s the worst that can happen? [Chorus] So meet the boys! Come on, settle on in Four grown men actin’ like kids again Different lives Different sides of the land All brought together by a controller in our hands We’ve talked some shit We’ve lost some sleep Made promises to get off that we never could keep And if tonight’s songs don’t make any sense— Just remember one thing: BLAME NATE FOR THIS! [Verse 4 — Landry] Last comes Landry, Navy nurse by trade Probably the best damn gamer of the four these days Consistently good, annoyingly so While the rest of us wonder where our talent went years ago He’s got two cats that run his home Never has to worry ‘bout bein’ alone And he claims there’s a girlfriend somewhere too… [Music slows] Now Landry… We believe you. [pause] We just ain’t got much reason to. [Band resumes] Never met the man face-to-face just yet But we’ve spent enough nights on the internet That when someday we finally shake hands It’ll feel less like meetin’… And more like seein’ an old friend again. [Music softens briefly] [Bridge — more sincere] Funny thing about friendship It don’t always start how you planned Sometimes it ain’t a hometown Or a beer and a handshake Sometimes it’s a headset On a long, quiet night Somebody says, “Invite my buddy” And somehow it sticks for life Nate knew me Nate knew them Then one night those worlds collided Years later, we’re still here… Even if Esh is rarely online. [Band immediately kicks back up] [Final Chorus — full band / crowd] SO MEET THE BOYS! There’s the old man dad! There’s the bald Navy officer gettin’ real mad! There’s Esh in his igloo Somewhere out west! And Landry with two cats Still claimin’ she exists! We’ve won some games We’ve lost a ton And somehow every bad night still turns into fun From COVID nights To wherever this ends We started out gaming— And wound up friends. Yeah, Nate brought the pieces And somehow they fit So if tonight goes completely to shit— Blame it on Nate. [Huge final chord] [Outro — spoken as applause continues] Now that you know these clowns, let’s get on with the rest of the show. Let’s have some fun, Red Rock!
