[Spoken Intro] My brain needs to stop. They’re not going anywhere. I know that. So why the fuck can’t my head believe it? [Verse 1] I know there’s nothing happening No reason for the sirens in my chest Nobody’s leaving, nobody promised me a thing But somehow my mind still makes a mess I don’t have a claim, I know I don’t I tell myself that over and over But I get too close, I get attached And suddenly every silence feels colder [Pre-Chorus] Maybe I should disappear awhile Until I can get control of this Because I hate how one person Can accidentally make me feel like this [Chorus] I hate that my brain makes me love too hard Makes every little distance feel miles apart You don’t even have to mean to hurt me My head will do that part And I hate this fucking disorder For turning closeness into fear Maybe I never should’ve opened up Never should’ve let anybody near Because if I shut back down If I crawl inside myself again Maybe nobody gets close enough To make me feel like this again [Verse 2] I’m angry at myself for caring Like attachment is something I should regret Like every piece of me I handed out Is something I should try to get back I know they aren’t going anywhere God, I know it, that’s the worst part Reality says that I am safe While my head is tearing me apart [Pre-Chorus] So I tell myself to separate Just until the noise gets quiet Because I don’t know how to stay close When every instinct says to hide it [Chorus] I hate that my brain makes me love too hard Makes every little distance feel miles apart You don’t even have to mean to hurt me My head will do that part And I hate this fucking disorder For turning closeness into fear Maybe I never should’ve opened up Never should’ve let anybody near Because if I shut back down If I crawl inside myself again Maybe nobody gets close enough To make me feel like this again [Bridge – stripped down] But that’s the lie, isn’t it? That I could’ve avoided all of this If I’d just stayed quiet Stayed distant Stayed impossible to miss No— Impossible to know Because part of me wants the closeness And part of me wants to run Part of me knows nothing’s wrong While the other comes undone And tonight the feelings are louder Than anything I can write I’m trying to pour them into ink But I don’t know if the pen’s enough tonight [Final Chorus] I hate that my brain makes me love too hard Makes safe people feel like loaded cards Turns somebody simply existing Into a war inside my heart I hate this fucking disorder I hate what fear can make me do Because nobody asked me to disappear That was my brain telling me to So maybe I don’t shut back down Maybe I just step away until it ends Because getting close was never the problem I’m just scared of losing them [Outro] They aren’t going anywhere. I know. I know. I know. I just need my brain to believe me
