[Open] I agreed. Obviously. Didn't read it. Nobody reads it. [Verse 1] Scroll. Scroll. Accept. Congratulations. I've apparently consented to updates, location services, occasional disappointment and you having access to my weekends. Could've put that near the top. [Hook] Terms may apply. They always do. Subject to change without telling you. Tick the box. Carry on. Find out later what you actually agreed to. [Verse 2] Clause seven: you can disappear for up to three working days then return with “sorry, manic week” and one kiss at the end. That's legally fascinating. Clause eight: I pretend I didn't notice. Initial here. [Break] [Male] Can I cancel? [Automated female] You may cancel at any time. [Male] Great. [Automated female] Cancellation does not affect previously incurred charges. [Male] Of course it doesn't. [Final Hook] Terms may apply. Fine. Here's mine. Don't say “casual” then act surprised when I casually leave. No signature. You saw it. [Ending] [Male] Accept? [One beat] [Cut]
