Nothing happened? Perfect. I panicked just in case. I’m a catastrophe coordinator, Future-problem generator. Got a spreadsheet for the storm, Color-coded, neat and warm. Nothing happened? Cool. I still checked the whole town. Marked the exits in green, Then I stress-walked around. I packed a bag for no disaster, Practiced breathing slightly faster. Made a list of things to fear, Then saved it for later this year. I got a little voice That says, “Better be ready.” So I label every box, And I hold the panic steady. I scheduled panic anyway, I scheduled panic anyway. If it goes wrong, I’m already there, With a folding chair and emergency flair. I scheduled panic anyway, I scheduled panic anyway. Nothing’s on fire, but just for fun, I planned the exit before we begun. I got snack bags lined up neat, Flashlights by the door. Backup plans for backup plans, And one backup more. You call it overkill, I call it peace of mind. When the ceiling cracks a little, I’m already in line. I don’t need a warning sign, I’ll invent one right on time. If the sky looks kind and clear, I ask, “What’s it hiding here?” I keep a spare excuse For the mess I expect. If the world behaves politely, I still double-check. I scheduled panic anyway, I scheduled panic anyway. If it goes wrong, I’m already there, With a folding chair and emergency flair. I scheduled panic anyway, I scheduled panic anyway. Nothing’s on fire, but just for fun, I planned the exit before we begun. Baby, I’m not crazy, I’m just early to the fear. I keep receipts for disaster, So the ending’s crystal clear. Call it anxious innovation, Call it mental preparation. If peace arrives, I’ll let it stay— But I scheduled panic anyway. I scheduled panic anyway, I scheduled panic anyway. If it goes wrong, I’m already there, With a folding chair and emergency flair. I scheduled panic anyway, I scheduled panic anyway. Nothing’s on fire, but just for fun, I planned the exit before we begun. No worries. Everything’s fine. Probably. I checked. Twice.
