
Hey Momma I'm Goin' Crazy
( opens with banjo, harmonica and fiddle) {Verse 1] I was drivin' 18 hours down Interstate 44 Dreamed a big fat momma crashed through my door, Holdin' a 12-gauge rifle and a pistol strapped to her side, I yelled, "Please don't shoot, I don't wanna dieâ My CB crackled with a ghostârunninâ tone, Trucker Ben whisperinâ, âBreaker oneânine, youâre not alone.â I saw my buddy Ben cruisinâ up, haulin' ballpoint pens, Just as I swerved past mile-marker ten. (Banjo and bass build up) [PreâChorus] I hollered, âHey Ben, could you give me a hand?â He said, âMy handleâs Jellybean, say it nice and clean, my man.â [Chorus] Hey momma, Iâm goinâ crazy, My CBâs buzzinâ and the staticâs hazy. Breakers yellinâ, âSon, you lost your lane,â World goinâ sideways like a runaway train. Hey momma, Iâm goinâ crazy, Eighteen hours on the road make a mind hazy. (banjo, harmonica and fiddle jam) [Verse 2] When I got home later that night, I opened up the door and flicked on the light, Dropped my keys on the counter by my old fish tank, Heard a strange thump-thump like somebody gettin' spanked. Took a little peek through my old keyhole, And nearly lost complete controlâ There was a bird in a cage, swinginâ left and right, Beatâbeatâbeatinâ up a donut like it owed him a fight. [PreâChorus] I stepped back slow, said, âLord, whatâd I just see?â That bird sippin' Gatorade and glarin' at me. [Chorus] Hey momma, Iâm goinâ crazy, Thereâs a bird in the house and the fight got lazy. Feathers flyinâ, donut crumbs on the floor, Gatorade spillinâ as heâs swinginâ for more. Hey momma, Iâm goinâ crazyâ Eighteen hours on the road make a mind hazy. [Bridge] Maybe I been drivinâ too long, Maybe the worldâs humminâ the wrong damn song, Maybe that birdâs got problems tooâ Who am I to judge what critters do? Ben once said, âBoy, let life be strange,â But if life had a manual, lost mine at mile -marker three. [Chorus (Final)] Hey momma, Iâm goinâ crazy, But the road gets wild and the nights get hazy. Big fat mommas, hills full of Jellybeans, Birdcage brawls, an impossible scene. Hey momma, Iâm goinâ crazyâ (spoken) But maybe⊠I kinda like it that way.

