[Verse 1] Why is writing songs so hard? As soon as I sit down with a pen My brain feels like lard My pain feels like— No, my BRAIN feels like lard! I guess this was bound to happen I asked ChatGPT to help me And the first line it wrote was "Gold neon static in my teeth" I said, "That's pretty stupid" Then I said, "That's sounds like me" I mean, pretty BAD! It's BAD! Why am I insulting me? [Pre-Chorus] I blinked at the page Like, what am I even doing? One good lie Keeps slipping through my fingers LINE! I meant LINE! I'm not deliberately lying! Not about anything important At least nothing worth denying [Chorus] Why is writing songs so hard? Why is hiding things so hard? WRITING! I said writing! I just wanna write one line That lands like a spark Why is writing songs so hard? Why is writing songs so hard? I keep chasing that feeling And I'm falling apart [Verse 2] Maybe I should write about love Maybe I should write about sex Maybe I should write about my mother— NO! WHAT? Where did that come from? I meant ANOTHER subject! Another subject! Something with a nice melody! Not my mother! That's weird! I should probably call her though It's been a year— A WEEK! It's been a week! And I'm a very good son! And I'm a very good lover— SONGWRITER! I'M A GOOD SONGWRITER! Why do I keep doing this? I'm trying to write a song Not a psychological test! [Pre-Chorus] Then the room got quiet And I heard myself laugh Maybe I don't need magic Maybe I need crack A BREAK! A break! I meant I need a break! Not crack! Holy Crap, How many mistakes can one man make? [Chorus] Why is writing songs so hard? Why is liking me so hard? WRITING SONGS! Why is WRITING SONGS so hard? I just want one line That lands like a spark I keep begging for attention— I mean chasing that feeling! And I'm falling apart [Verse 3] Okay, back to writing lyrics Keep it simple, keep it light I need a hook to make 'em listen I need a hug to sleep at night— HOOK! I meant HOOK! I don't need to be embraced! I need a catchy little melody To fill this empty space— PAGE! I meant PAGE! There's a space here on the page! Not an empty space inside me I've been carrying since age eight! Maybe give it some emotion Make it honest, make it raw I want people to enjoy it I want people to applaud— ADORE! No, APPLAUD! No, ENJOY! That was the word! Why is every second line A confession I haven't heard?! Let me try a simple couplet Something clever, something fine "Every cloud has silver lining Every star deserves to shine" "Please don't leave me like the others"— THAT'S NOT EVEN A RHYME! I meant "Everything is normal!" I mean "Everything is fine!" EVERYTHING IS FINE! WHY CAN'T I FINISH ONE DAMN LINE?! I just want to write a good song SO MY DAD WILL LOVE ME THIS TIME! [Pause] ...I meant rhyme. write a good rhyme. [Bridge] So I write the bad line first Let it stain the page Let it trip, let it fall Let it show my age If I can't be brilliant I can still be feared— HEARD! I meant HEARD! I just want to be heard! I just want some validation I mean artistic inspiration I just want a little recognition I mean creative satisfaction I don't need your love! I need your money! I mean I need your approval! I mean I need my father to say he's proud of me! [Instrumental stops] [Spoken] ...Where the hell did THAT come from again? [Breakdown – increasingly frantic] I'm a confident person! I'm a competent person! I'm an impotent person— IMPORTANT! IMPORTANT! THAT IS NOT WHAT I MEANT! I've got nothing to hide! I've got nothing inside! I've got nothing to offer— I MEAN NOTHING TO PROVE! I'm perfectly stable! I'm perfectly able! I'm perfectly willing To sleep under the table! —what? [Final Chorus – desperately trying to recover] Why is writing songs so hard? Why is hiding all my scars? Why am I afraid of being vulnerable? WHY CAN'T I JUST WRITE A SONG?! I just want one line That lands like a spark I just want somebody to tell me I'm a worthwhile human being! I MEAN— WHY IS WRITING SONGS SO HARD?! WHY IS WRITING SONGS SO HARD?! I KEEP CHASING THAT FEELING AND I'M FALLING APART! [Outro – quiet, exhausted] Maybe I don't need magic Maybe I don't need art Maybe I just need someone To hold my beating heart [Spoken] ...Pen. I meant pen. Someone to hold my pen. [Pause] That's a perfectly normal thing to say.. [Long pause] ...I should probably delete this.
