Washed hands. Jokers

So. Eighteen forty seven. A doctor named Semmelweis Walked into a hospital in Vienna And noticed something. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: hehehe the quiet laugh of someone about to detonate hehehe] [CROWD: heh heh. okay. doctor. hospital. heh.] Women were dying. After childbirth. At catastrophic rates. On the ward run by doctors. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: heh. loaded. heh.] The ward run by midwives. Fine. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: HAHAHAHA ALREADY HAHAHAHA WE'RE ALREADY HERE HAHAHAHA] [CROWD: ha ha wait HA HA] Semmelweis looked at the doctors. Looked at the midwives. Looked at the doctors again. And noticed. The doctors were coming straight from autopsies. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: hehehehe the hehe of someone watching the room realize it hehehehe] [CROWD: ha... oh... ha... OH.] Cadaver particles. His words. Cadaver particles. On unwashed hands. Going directly into patients. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: heh. the silence heh. heh.] [CROWD: silence. someone stopped laughing.] So he said. Gentlemen. Wash your hands. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: HAHAHAHA WASH YOUR HANDS HAHAHAHA THE MOST REASONABLE SENTENCE EVER SPOKEN HAHAHAHA] [CROWD: HA HA yes wash hands HA HA obviously HA HA] And they said. No! [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: heh. flat. devastating. heh.] [CROWD: ha? ...no? ha?] We are doctors. Our hands are clean by virtue of being our hands. Clearly we are beyond fault! Practically perfect! The idea that WE are killing patients — Is an insult to our professional dignity. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: HAHAHAHA PROFESSIONAL DIGNITY HAHAHAHA OVER DEAD MOTHERS HAHAHAHA] [CROWD: HAHAHA nervous now HAHAHA the laughter of people recognizing the pattern HAHAHA] He had DATA. Death rates dropped dramatically. On every ward where hand washing was implemented. Numbers. Actual numbers. I got a few numbers I'd like to crunch for you...thats for later. At the meeting at the docks. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: hehehe the hehe of someone who has shown receipts before hehehe] [CROWD: ha ha. they have receipts. ha ha.] They laughed him out of Vienna. Out of Budapest. Out of every institution he tried. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: heh. quiet. heh.] He died in an asylum. Eighteen sixty five. Possibly beaten by guards. Who washed didn't their hands. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: heh. not funny. just true. heh.] [CROWD: silence. full stop silence.] Vindicated. Twenty years later. When Pasteur proved germ theory. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: HAHAHAHA TWENTY YEARS HAHAHAHA OF PREVENTABLE DEATHS HAHAHAHA BECAUSE OF DIGNITY HAHAHAHA] [CROWD: HAHAHA the uncomfortable laugh HAHAHA the laugh of people who know this pattern isn't over HAHAHA] Now. NOW. I need you to think about something. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: hehehe careful now hehehe the turn is coming hehehe] How many Semmelweises are alive. Right now. Today. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: heh. just heh. pointed directly at the room.] [CROWD: ha... ha... the smile fading into something.] With data. With numbers. With receipts. Standing outside institutions. Being told their findings are an insult to professional dignity. To their established way of how we do things. Right or wrong. Mostly wrong. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: HAHAHAHA PROFESSIONAL DIGNITY HAHAHAHA THE IMMUNE SYSTEM OF ESTABLISHED POWER HAHAHAHA] [CROWD: HAHAHA then quieter HAHAHA then quieter still] The water memory researcher. The frequency medicine practitioner. The sintering engineer saying deserts can become cities. The atmospheric scientist saying we could seed clouds over dead zones. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: hehehe the laugh that is also a list hehehe] [CROWD: ha. just ha. nodding slowly.] All of them. Waiting. For their Pasteur moment. Which comes. It always comes. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: heh. warm now. certain. heh.] Twenty years too late. Or right on time. Depending on whether you built the asylum. Or the hand washing station. [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: HAHAHAHA CHOOSE CAREFULLY HAHAHAHA YOU ARE CHOOSING RIGHT NOW HAHAHAHA] [CROWD: sustained. warm. the applause of people making a quiet decision about which side of history they intend to occupy. not loud. just certain. the best kind.] Wash your hands! Obviously! [MAD WIZARD LAUGH: heh. final. obvious. heh.] [CROWD: one last laugh. the warmest one. they get it. they all get it. they always got it. they just needed someone to write it down.]