by: Unknown date: Unknown source: Unknown In a cave, there lived an old troll His diet grisly, his manners droll. Many a youth he caught and he ate, "Raw, with carrots - really great." In a castle, there lived a knight. His lance was long, his armor bright. Many quests he carefully planned But never went, his courage unmanned. In a village there dwelt a sweet maid The fairest that e'er the gods have made. Poor but proud; she lived alone Beauty naught but skin and bone. In a deep forest berries grew Bright and red, good but few. Hither went the lady fair Her savage hunger to repair. In one sniff the old troll knew The makings of a small meat stew Had wandered near his hidden home. To he who waits, all meals roam. In a huff that knight so bold Rode out to spend his grudging gold. For his cupboard was bare, ale low - And through the forest he did go. In a trice, the lady found her food: Berries ripe, and berries good. By the handful she did eat. (The troll approached on nimble feet.) Full, the maiden turned to go. Out leaped the trolling, crying "So! My dinner's come, in cap and gown!" And the knight, unseeing, rode him down. "Oh, my hero!" sighed the lady, "My life is thine - marry me!" The knight, afraid, backed his steed - Hooves again treading troll mead. "Good lady," stammed the warrior bold, "My sight is poor, my limbs are old. Am I then thy only choice?" "Yes," she cried, "And I rejoice!" "Oh, dear," then said the noble knight And fainted dead away from fright. Over backwards he did crash, His armor making foul troll hash. "Oh, my lord!" cried the gentle maid. "So noble, so modest, so gently made!" And loving arms around him put, Trampling troll cakes underfoot. "What? Ho!" the dazed knight did moan. "I am beaten and overthrown! By my honor, I surrender me To my foe the victory!" And he struggled to one knee His conqueror so bright to see - Beheld in wonder blushing maid, (Under both, troll tiles laid.) "I am yours! Command me, I beg!" Quoth the knight, making a leg. "Up then, sir!" said that lady "My lord and husband thou shalt be!" And up he got, armor a-clank, (Troll blood unwitting spurs drank), And set his lady upon his horse. Together they rode o'er troll - of course. And when the hooves had died away, The troll on the ground did stay, Feeling every little bit of pain As his bits came together again. But men, like trolls, never learn Beautiful maidens sharp to spurn, And so the song goes round again The fallen always suffering pain.
