[Verse 1] Harken now to our tale's end, the grandest part of all! Our hero's path grows darkest yet, before the tyrant's fall! For Prince Humperdinck's men appeared, as lovers found their truth, And Wesley, brave but outnumbered, was captured without ruth! [Verse 2] To dungeons deep they dragged him down, the Pit of Despair named, Where Count Rugen, six fingers cursed, his torture machine aimed! "I'll steal your life," the villain grinned, "but not all at once, my friend." "I'll take your years of joy away, and watch your spirit bend!" [Verse 3] The Machine drained life's essence away, Wesley's screams rang loud and clear! A sound that echoed through the woods, a cry of anguish sheer! The Prince, enraged by foreign threats, moved wedding plans ahead, While Buttercup, in chambers grand, wished she instead were dead! [Verse 4] But hark! The Spaniard and the Giant, sought Wesley in the wood, Guided by the cries of pain that no brave heart withstood! Too late they came, for Wesley lay, with stillness in his breast, "He's only mostly dead," said Max, the miracle man blessed! [Verse 5] With chocolate coating bitter pill, Max worked his healing art, A bellows pumped, a potion mixed, to restart Wesley's heart! "True love," the cause worth living for, brought strength to limbs so weak, Though paralyzed, his mind stayed sharp, his vengeance still to seek! [Verse 6] The wedding day arrived at last, Buttercup walked in grief, While three heroes planned assault, to bring the bride relief! The Spaniard sought six fingers cold, the Giant stormed the gate, And Wesley, carried on friend's back, would challenge royal fate! [Verse 7] "Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya," rang through castle halls, "You killed my father, prepare to die!" echoed off the walls! Six times he thrust the blade home true, once for each cursed finger, Justice served for father's death, no mercy did he linger! [Verse 8] [Intensifying] In royal chambers, Wesley lay, too weak to lift a blade, Yet with his wit and fearsome name, a mighty bluff he made! "To the pain," he warned the Prince, describing torment vile, Humperdinck surrendered then, revealing coward's guile! [Verse 9] [Building to Climax] Four heroes fled the castle grounds, on stallions white as snow, The Giant, Spaniard, Farm Boy true, and Princess all aglow! Their kiss, when shared in moonlight pure, surpassed all kisses past, A love that conquered death itself, forevermore to last! [Final Flourish] [Triumphant] So ends our tale of Wesley brave, who proved that love endures Beyond all trials that fate might send, true passion still assures! Remember well this legend bold, when darkness seems too deep, For true love conquers all, my friends, a promise we should keep! [Epilogue] Now fill my cup one final time, for ballads three I've sung! Of farm boy turned to pirate king, whose praises should be rung! "As you wish," I say to you, who've listened to my tale, For minstrels live by audience grace, when all else seems to fail!
