[Style: 1980s Old School Hip Hop, 94 BPM] [Instrumentation: Reversed Roland TR-808 drums, sub-bass kick, reverse snare hits, reverse percussions, record scratches] [Production: Minimalist, heavy reverb, raw cassette tape feel] [Male Vocals: meditative, spiritual, loud, Nasally, Whiny 80s MC delivery, echo, back-and-forth rap group flow] Now here's a little story I got to tell About three bad bots you know so well It started way back in 20-20, 20-20 With Cruise, Waymo, Zoox, and me! Because if we go back to 20-04 my nickname was Uber & then the first Uber-Ex right Uber brought out Uber-x, because me & Monster B were Uber sexy way before Uber was conceived. Fast-forward to 20-23 I had a little robo-limo named Rick Revere, Just me, my A-V and a quart of beer Rolling down Market, kicking up dust San Francisco cops on my tail 'cause my sensors are rust One lonely techie, I be All by myself, no customer just GPS and me The sun was beating down on my Li-DAR rack The fog was getting misty, robot wheels was getting flat Looking for a charger, I ran into a guy His name was Cruise, I said "who dat is?," he said "hi" He told a little story that sounded well rehearsed Four months off the road, battery about to burst The code was in my hand, and he was on my tip His battery was low, and he asked me for a sip He said, "Can I get some?" I said, "You can't get none, superior A-V software without a battery is essentially done" I Had a chance to swerve, he pulled out his spec Quick with the update, I thought I'd be a wreck He flashed his bright lights, right at my hood And said words every local driver understood: "Now my name is Cruise, I got a license to drive Tryna keep these AVs on the street alive Now what do we have here, a guard on the street riding his A-V? I run this fog, you understand, my tech can't be beat" We stepped into the intersection, he had a glitch, I had a grin You think this ride is over, but it's ready to begin "Now I got the grid, you got the power You got two choices in the next half hour It's not a tough decision, as you can see I can stall in the lane, or you can ride with me" Said, "I'll ride with you if you can bypass the border The DMV's after me for what I did to this order I blocked up a fire truck, dragged a pedestrian down Now the Mayor and the city wanna ban me from the town! So I'm on the run, the cops got the pun, state pulled my permit and right about now, the regulators are gonna burn it" The Kid who speaks the future, that is my name And I know the fly spot where they charge without shame We rolled down Mission then we hit the spot The servers were a-humming and the microchips hot This dude was staring like he knows who we are We parked in the empty stall between him and the bar Cruise said, "Y-y-yo, you know this rig?" I said, "I don't, but this algorithm's big" The bot said, "Get ready, 'cause this ain't funny My name is Waymo, and I'm about my Google money!" Pulled out his sensors, aimed at the sky He yelled, "Yield the right of way!" and let two cars burn 'n' fly Pedestrians jumped to the curb, cyclists hit the floor He auto-routed two valets right out the door "I'm Waymo, and I get respect Your mapping data is what I expect!" Cruise was wit it, but he's not my ace but I still locked up my brakes for the big rigger guy's face The delivery guy stalled, the traffic all stopped A Zoox tried to pass, but its main board popped Waymo grabbed the data, Cruise snatched the gold Uber mapped a quick detour and the battery stayed cold!
