Phone vibrates, a subtle glow Don’t even check it, I already know That same old photo, that same old memory Just reminds me everything's temporary Now it feels like somebody kicked the door Letting cold air flood the floor I swear I hit my limit, I’m done How many times can you lose someone? Here I am still Ceiling, fan, slow spinning Didn’t ask for this morning But I’m breathing again Here I am again, damn it Waking up again Dragging on these boots Like they’re made of lead I’m tired of the “why” Tired of the calls Tired of hearing, “another one” Like it’s nothing at all I’m loyal to the memories Even when it burns Just carrying severance Waiting for it to hurt Here I am again Still here. Again. Couple months and it’ll roll back round Another date that weighs on my soul Another name I won’t say loud Another piece from my whole Everybody’s sad, I know they are I see it in their eyes But I’m so damn sick of being strong And swallowing goodbyes Here I am still Knuckles white on the sink Cold water on my face Trying not to think Here I am again, damn it Pulling it together again Forcing on these boots Cause quitting ain’t in my skin I’ve buried more than I should For one lifetime, I swear But I keep showing up Even when life’s not fair Bridge (low, almost spoken) I can’t stand another, “again” Can’t stand that word Feels like the world keeps taking And thinking they can tell me about “hurt” I ain't ruminating on the leaving I just hate the mess it makes The quiet it leaves behind The space only the empty takes Here I am again, damn it Breathing through the ache Carrying ghosts in daylight Every step I take Mad at the morning Mad at the past But I’m still here standing And I ain’t the one who'll leave last Here I am. Still. Again. OooOhA
