[Verse 1: Roadhouse-rock male lead, shuffling boogie drums, barroom guitar riff] Rhonda's Roadhouse, Route 9, Friday and it's packed Hellfire Dozen on the chalkboard and the rules are on the back Twelve wings, eight minutes, no milk and no bread No napkins and no cryin', and you sign it if you're dead Four times I tried it and four times I went down Once I swore I saw my grandma and she don't live in this town Tonight I'm wearin' stretchy pants and a shirt I didn't need Rhonda says, darlin', you sure? I said, lady, proceed Whole bar starts chantin' Earl, Earl, louder than the band Timer on the bar top and a sweat rag in my hand [Hook: Roadhouse-rock male lead, full band, rowdy roadhouse-rock hook] I'm gonna wing it, ain't no plan Twelve on the plate and a sweatin' man Wing it, wing it, Rhonda, bring the heat Hot damn, I'm on fire and I can't feel my feet [Verse 2: Roadhouse-rock male lead, greasy lead guitar, shuffling boogie drums] Wing one, wing two, I'm a natural, I'm a pro Wing three, I'm seein' colors, wing four, I lose my nose Wing five, I'm talkin' Latin, wing six, I'm talkin' Greek Some trucker in a ballcap starts to pray for both my cheeks Seven, eight and nine, the sweat is runnin' in my eyes Rhonda's standin' with her arms crossed and she don't look surprised Ten wings down and my lips have gone numb Two to go, hot damn, and I can't feel my tongue [Hook: Roadhouse-rock male lead, full band, rowdy roadhouse-rock hook] I'm gonna wing it, ain't no plan Twelve on the plate and a sweatin' man Wing it, wing it, Rhonda, bring the heat Hot damn, I'm on fire and I can't feel my feet [Verse 3: Roadhouse-rock male lead, bar-top slaps, a flat hand slaps the bar top on every wing over the band] Eleven. Twelve. And I slam it on the wood Minute on the clock and the whole bar's feelin' good They're liftin' me up and they're snappin' my picture Earl on the wall like a permanent fixture Then the kitchen door swings and here comes Rhonda back out With a second plate smokin' and the whole room shouts Twelve more wings and they're glowin' kinda red She leans down to my ear and here's what she said Darlin', those were the mild ones, that was just for show Here's the Hellfire Dozen, honey, eight minutes, go [Final Hook: Roadhouse-rock male lead, full band lifting, rowdiest roadhouse-rock hook] I'm gonna wing it, ain't no plan Twelve on the plate and a sweatin' man Wing it, wing it, Rhonda, bring the heat Hot damn, I'm on fire and I can't feel my feet [End]
