[Intro – Talkbox, bubbling synthesizer, rubbery bass] "Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the Department of Funk!" "Today's experiment concerns the relationship between rhythm and intelligence." "Preliminary findings indicate..." [Talkbox] "More bounce... than brains!" [Verse 1] I got a doctorate in boogie, a diploma in funk Got a bassline so thick it'll swallow a truck I ain't book-smart, never claimed to be But I got more degrees than a thermometer needs Got a laboratory full of funky machines A test-tube baby with some bell-bottom jeans My calculations say the groove don't lie If your head ain't moving, then your brain's on standby I'm a certified freak with a government grant Got a funky little theory that your mama can't stand You can study all night, you can read all day But the funk don't come from a book anyway! [Chorus – Talkbox and group vocals] More bounce than brains! (MORE BOUNCE!) More bounce than brains! (LESS THINKING!) Shake what your mama gave ya Don't let the rhythm change ya! More bounce than brains! (MORE BOUNCE!) More bounce than brains! (KEEP STINKIN'!) We got the funk, we got the flow A little less sense and a whole lotta soul! [Verse 2] I got a funky little robot named Eugene He can play twelve instruments and keep his sneakers clean I gave him a groove and a brand-new suit Now he's dancing in the kitchen with a monkey in his boot My assistant's got a mohawk and a polyester coat She can play the bass guitar with her eyes in her throat We got strange vibrations coming out the wall And a giant purple chicken in the conference hall! The dean said, "Professor, you're a danger to science!" I said, "Brother, have you tried turning up the violins?" He said, "Your research is completely insane!" I said, "That's because you ain't got no bounce in your brain!" [Chorus – Talkbox and group vocals] More bounce than brains! (MORE BOUNCE!) More bounce than brains! (LESS THINKING!) Shake what your mama gave ya Don't let the rhythm change ya! More bounce than brains! (MORE BOUNCE!) More bounce than brains! (KEEP STINKIN'!) We got the funk, we got the flow A little less sense and a whole lotta soul! [Instrumental Break – Extended funk jam, talkbox solo, slap bass, synth flourishes] [Talkbox] "Bounce... bounce... bounce..." [Spoken interlude] "Attention, students!" "Please report to the dance floor immediately." "Your final examination will consist of..." "FUNK!" [Verse 3] Now the mayor came around to shut the place down Said the noise was disturbing the folks downtown I said, "Mr. Mayor, you got a serious condition You're suffering from a chronic lack of rhythm!" He said, "Professor, I don't understand your thesis." I said, "That's alright, baby, neither do my nieces." Then I plugged in the bass and I cranked up the sound And the whole city council started shaking their gowns! Now the fire marshal's dancing, the judge is in a trance The local police department just declared a dance The governor's in the corner doing something obscene And the president's requesting a copy of the scene! [Bridge – Call and response] Professor: "What's the first rule of funk?" Crew: "DON'T THINK!" Professor: "What's the second rule of funk?" Crew: "JUST MOVE!" Professor: "And what's the third rule?" Crew: "TURN THAT DAMN THING UP!" [Final Chorus – Full band, layered vocals, talkbox] More bounce than brains! (MORE BOUNCE!) More bounce than brains! (LESS THINKING!) Shake what your mama gave ya Don't let the rhythm change ya! More bounce than brains! (MORE BOUNCE!) More bounce than brains! (KEEP STINKIN'!) We got the funk, we got the flow A little less sense and a whole lotta soul! [Outro – Talkbox and fading funk groove] "Class dismissed!" "Your homework is to shake your behind." "Extra credit for excessive funk." [Talkbox] "More bounce... than brains..." [End]
