Back then in our pub, in our circle of friends - those who already had cars (beer: 16 yrs / drive: 18 yrs) would often drive to the Alps for weekend skiing trips. I heard this story later, during my next visit to the pub once everyone was back. There was a lot of laughter, and the two remained friends. But he was right: "How do I tell your mom?"😁🤣 ----------------- [Verse 1] Friday night we owned the bar, drank like we were rock'n'roll stars, after-ski till half past three, bad decisions laughing free. Saturday came way too fast, head still living in the past, chairlift climbing through the snow, just two buddies riding slow. [Pre-Chorus] You were sleeping by my side, drooling on your jacket wide, then the mountain heard a sound... the loudest fart for miles around! [Chorus] Nobody's gonna believe this tale, you nearly flew right off the rail, scared yourself awake so bad, started flapping like a madman had! Nobody's gonna believe what I saw, you almost lost a fight with your own rear end's roar, thank the safety bar above, it saved your butt with mountain love! [Verse 2] Out of dreams and into shock, you jumped like lightning hit the rock, arms were rowing through the air, panic floating everywhere. Chairlift swinging left and right, I thought you'd disappear from sight, for one long second I could tell, you almost took the shortcut down the hill. [Pre-Chorus] What was I supposed to say? If you'd actually fallen away, "Officer, sir, here's the truth..." Yeah, nobody would buy that proof! [Chorus] Nobody's gonna believe this tale, you nearly flew right off the rail, scared yourself awake so bad, started flapping like a madman had! Nobody's gonna believe what I saw, you almost lost a fight with your own rear end's roar, thank the safety bar above, it saved your butt with mountain love! [Bridge] How do I explain to your mom? Your son got launched by his own bomb? Too much beer and too much gas, that's a risky mountain pass! [Final Chorus] Nobody's gonna believe this tale, drunk on a chairlift, pale as hell, startled by your own backside, almost took a downhill flight! Nobody's gonna believe it's true, but every single word is due, the moral's simple, clear and smart: Don't ride chairlifts drunk... and don't trust a sleeping fart! [Outro] Yeah, nobody's gonna believe me... unless they were sitting right there next to me.
