[Verse 1] They wrote it down depression, anxiety hands on my wrists like I’m a file, not me Put me on pills tell me, “now you’ll be fine” but my head still shakes like a door in the wind Family said leave packed all my clothes in a bag stood on the curb with my name in the trash I kept my face straight didn’t let it crack once but I felt my ribs turn to paper and dust [Pre-Chorus] Prayed on my knees prayed with my eyes shut tight nothing came down nothing changed in my life I ask for a sign I get silence back every road I take turns cold and black [Chorus] Backwards only backwards only I keep falling behind Backwards only backwards only ain’t no light in sight All my prayers hit the ceiling and fade I go no direction but backward today [Verse 2] Sleeping in spots that don’t know my name bus stop bench cold chain-link rain Phone dead flat got no one to call thumb on my screen like I’m counting the fall They say “be strong” like that makes it true I’m holding this weight with a busted grip too Every door closed every face turned away I’m still in the room but I don’t get to stay [Pre-Chorus] Prayed on my knees prayed with my eyes shut tight nothing came down nothing changed in my life I ask for a sign I get silence back every road I take turns cold and black [Chorus] Backwards only backwards only I keep falling behind Backwards only backwards only ain’t no light in sight All my prayers hit the ceiling and fade I go no direction but backward today [Bridge] If you see me I’m not okay I’m just surviving another bad day I want a door I want a hand I want one minute to understand But the world keeps spinning and I’m standing still same dark room same bitter pill [Chorus] Backwards only backwards only I keep falling behind Backwards only backwards only ain’t no light in sight All my prayers hit the ceiling and fade I go no direction but backward today
