# Be Prepared. Be Quiet. *The PAPS Song* [Intro — Cheerful acoustic guitar, flute and glockenspiel, vintage children's television theme] [Spoken — Friendly, enthusiastic female instructor] Hello, campers! Welcome to the Prairie Atlantis Preservation Society! Today we're going to learn about teamwork, wilderness safety... [Pause] ...and how not to be seen. [Bright musical flourish] [Verse 1 — Cheerful female lead] Pack your bag and tie your shoes, There's a trail for you to choose! Bring a rope and bring a light, Check your knots and pack them tight! Watch the weather, read the signs, Take your time and mind the pines! When a neighbour needs a hand, That's the time to make a stand! [Chorus — Warm mixed campfire chorus] Be prepared! Be quiet! There's no need to make a riot! Through the forest, through the night, Keep your friends and home in sight! Find your way and do what's right, Keep your campfire burning bright! Be prepared! Be quiet! That's the PAPS way! [Verse 2 — Acoustic folk rhythm, playful flute] Canoe paddles, camping gear, Nothing very strange to see! Just a minivan with six good friends, And a thermos full of tea! Leave no trace and lend a hand, Know the trails across the land! And if somebody means you harm, Well, there's no need for alarm! [Music shifts — Quick woodblocks, plucked strings, mysterious bamboo flute] [Verse 3 — Playful but increasingly stealthy] Slip behind the cedar tree, Move where no one thinks to see! Cross the river, climb the stone, Take the long way safely home! Find the lost and guard the weak, Learn when not to fight or speak! If a villain comes around, He may find himself quite— [Sudden silence] [Spoken — Cheerful female instructor] Gary? [Spoken — Mischievous older male voice] Upside down? [Pause] [Female instructor] Gary, what have we discussed about unnecessary traps? [Male voice] That they're unnecessary? [Female instructor] Very good. [Male voice] Unless they're necessary. [Short comic percussion flourish] [Instrumental Ninja Break — Nimble flute, rapid wooden percussion, plucked strings, dramatic stealth-adventure melody] [Verse 4 — Mysterious yet cheerful] Secrecy! Know what to keep! Loyalty! The ties run deep! Duty! Do what must be done! And bring your neighbours safely home! There's a place for everyone, Work to do beneath the sun! Whether old or young or new, There's a trail ahead of you! [Chorus — Full campfire ensemble, energetic handclaps] Be prepared! Be quiet! There's no need to make a riot! Through the forest, through the night, Keep your friends and home in sight! Find your way and do what's right, Keep your campfire burning bright! Be prepared! Be quiet! That's the PAPS way! [Bridge — Music softens, gentle acoustic guitar and fiddle] [Female lead — Sincere and warm] When the stars are shining bright, And the mountains fill the night, If you've learned the trails you roam, You will always find your home. [Spoken — Female instructor] Remember, campers... The best ninja knows when not to fight. [Pause] And always clean up your campsite. [Final Chorus — Cheerful group singalong, clapping, flute and guitar] Be prepared! Be quiet! There's no need to make a riot! Help your friends and do what's right, Keep your promises tonight! Through the woods and mountain air, You'll find PAPS is everywhere! Be prepared! Be quiet! That's the PAPS way! [Outro — Campfire guitar, cheerful whistling and flute] [Spoken — Older male voice, whispering] Penny? [Female instructor] Yes, Gary? [Male voice] Where's the minivan? [Long pause] [Female instructor] Gary. [Single woodblock knock] [End]
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