Too hot to function

Aight, aight, aight... I need y'all to sit down for a second 'Cause we need to have a serious conversation About some very questionable life choices people are making out here I'm talking about... the heat lovers Yeah. You know who you are. Lemme get this straight, you LIKE feeling like a pan? You walk outside in August with a smile and a tan? Sweating through your shirt before you reach the car Calling it "good weather" — brother, that's a scar I see you posting sunsets, "living for this heat" While I'm watching you dissolve slowly in the street Your phone is at a hundred, your body's at a hundred two At what temperature exactly does it click for you? You say the cold is brutal, say the cold ain't fun Meanwhile you're out here getting cooked by the sun I'd rather wear a jacket, drink a coffee, feel alive Not question every life choice just to barely survive Cold air hits different, man it hits just right You can always add a layer, can't subtract the night Heat just takes from you, cold gives you back your brain Tell me which one's sane Too hot to function, too hot to think You call this paradise, I call it the brink Give me forty degrees and a hoodie any day Y'all can keep your summer, I'll be okay Too hot (too hot) somebody turn it down I don't want your sunshine, I want a cold town Too hot to function — and that's on you I'm just the only one here with a clue Now let's talk science 'cause I got receipts Your productivity drops when it exceeds the heat Studies show cognition takes a serious dive Above ninety degrees you're just trying to survive Meanwhile in the cold I'm locked in, I'm focused Writing dissertations while you're sunburned and hopeless Hot coffee in my hand, crisp air in my lungs You're out here eating hot chips under three suns And don't get me started on the AC debate You cranked the heat outside then cool it — a little late You manufactured your own personal hell Then complained about the electric bill as well Cold air hits different, man it hits just right You can always add a layer, can't subtract the night Heat just takes from you, cold gives you back your brain Tell me which one's sane Too hot to function, too hot to think You call this paradise, I call it the brink Give me forty degrees and a hoodie any day Y'all can keep your summer, I'll be okay Too hot (too hot) somebody turn it down I don't want your sunshine, I want a cold town Too hot to function — and that's on you I'm just the only one here with a clue You said "I hate the cold, it gets in my bones" I said "that's called being alive, leave me alone" You said "the beach is heaven" I said "sand in my everything" You said "but the vibes" — BRO WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN I've never seen a cold person lose their mind I've seen plenty of heat people leave their sense behind Sunstroke is a medical condition, look it up Hot people stay irrational — I rest my case, I'm done [Instrumental Break — Boom Bap Solo] (Classic boom bap beat breakdown — scratching, heavy kicks, snare rolls) Too hot to function, too hot to think You call this paradise, I call it the brink Give me forty degrees and a hoodie any day Y'all can keep your summer, I'll be okay Too hot, too hot! Somebody turn it down I don't want your sunshine, I want a cold town Too hot to function — and that's on you I'm just the only one here with a clue Too hot... too hot... Y'all really out here choosing this voluntarily Too hot... too hot... I just want the record to show I warned everybody When the robots take over they gon' ask one question "Hot or cold?" and imma pass that test with no second guessin' Cold people built civilization, look at the facts Hot people built beach bars — and I respect that, but... Too hot... nah... Too hot... never... Give me a cold front and a blanket And I'll be fine forever