"Porch Light Was Still On"

Intro (distant crickets) (truck tires slowly crunching across wet gravel) (windshield wipers dragging slow) (engine humming low) (Claude exhales tired) (gear shifts into park) (truck engine turns off) (silence… soft rain hitting hood metal) (another pair of headlights appear in distance) Claude Bane (spoken low, tired): …there he is. (long pause) Damn. (lighter flicks) He early too… (Claude watches quietly) Look at that… Already walking to her door. (truck door opens across the road) (soft laugh from distance) Yeah… she laughing different now. (low steel guitar hum fades in) He opened the door for her… (small pause) I used to be too damn tired… too damn proud… too damn sure she’d always stay. (Claude swallows hard) Nah… that man listening. That’s the difference. (distant porch screen door opens) And there she go… Soft smile and all. Ain’t seen that smile in a long time. (rain drips from truck roof) Funny… The porch light still on. But it ain’t waiting on me no more. (slow acoustic guitar begins) Verse 1 I stayed parked across the county road Like somehow pain would change its mind Dashboard glow and a half-burned smoke Watching your life move on tonight He walked up calm, no rushing steps Like loving you came natural One hand reaching for your coat Other hand holding that truck door And you leaned in close when he spoke low Like your heart finally unclenched Lord, I felt every mile between The man I was and what you needed then Pre-Chorus I used to think love meant Just showing up after work But some women need more than a body Standing in the dirt And Heaven help me… I see that now. Chorus The porch light was still on Like you thought I might come back Little round table by the swing With your handwriting on the back Rain rolling down that old receipt Like Heaven knew I’d read it slow “Paid in full with regret…” Damn… that hurt more than you know And across that gravel driveway I watched somebody hold you right While I stood there learning too late What love looked like under that light The porch light was still on… But you were already gone… Verse 2 After y’all pulled off down the road I walked up slow through muddy rain That old porch creaked beneath my boots Like it remembered my last name Coffee cup still sitting there Holding down that folded page Store receipt from Shell gas station Ink bleeding softly in the rain “Love I gave — $0.00” God… I felt my whole chest sink Cause I remembered every night You cried beside me at the sink And all them times you asked me questions I answered halfway at best Thinking paying bills and coming home Was all a woman could expect Pre-Chorus But peace ain’t bought with silence And love ain’t measured just staying around Sometimes the man who loses you The hardest… The last to figure it out Chorus The porch light was still on Like you thought I might come back Little round table by the swing With your handwriting on the back Rain rolling down that old receipt Like Heaven knew I’d read it slow “Paid in full with regret…” Damn… that hurt more than you know And across that gravel driveway I watched somebody hold you right While I stood there learning too late What love looked like under that light The porch light was still on… But you were already gone… Bridge (violin slowly rises) Ain’t nobody teach us men How to hear a woman breaking soft We notice slammed doors and packed bags But not the nights she slowly gets lost You begged for little things I laughed off Coffee talks… holding hands… being present Now another man gets your easy smile And I finally understand it (Claude voice cracks slightly) That receipt wasn’t paper… It was proof. Final Chorus The porch light was still on Casting shadows through the rain And that little note beside the swing Still carrying my blame He probably kissed your forehead While I sat there in that drive Learning too much love can die Without anybody saying goodbye And I folded up that old receipt Like something sacred in my hands Cause losing you finally taught me How to love… too late again The porch light was still on… But it wasn’t mine anymore… (steel guitar cries softly) No… It wasn’t mine anymore… Outro (truck engine starts slowly) (rain continues falling softly) (windshield wipers dragging slow again) Claude Bane (spoken quietly): Hope he keeps that light on for you… (long pause) …better than I did. (deep exhale) And for what it’s worth… I wanna be clear. I loved you mentally… Every single day I did. But physically… I know it didn’t appear that way. (silence) And for that… I’m sorry. I truly am. Cause now I understand… Love ain’t just what sits in a man’s heart. It’s what a woman feels from him… every day. (soft steel guitar cries in distance) And I finally see it now. (truck slowly drives off into rain) Written by 12Gauge858 Music