[Intro | cheerful 1950s television theme | soft piano | gentle whistling | warm friendly male voice] What a lovely day outside, Won't you come along for a ride? The sun is shining, skies are blue, I've got a little drink for you! [Music stops | deep voice shouts] **TEQUILA!** [Instrumental | bouncy 1950s rock and roll | twangy electric guitar | honking saxophone | handclaps] [Verse 1 | overly cheerful male voice] It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood, Everybody's feeling pretty good! Take off your coat, come on inside, There's a little something I can't hide! I've got my slippers, I've got my chair, I've got a bottle hiding over there! [Sudden silence] **TEQUILA!** [Instrumental break | classic surf-rock guitar riff | saxophone blasts | pounding drums] [Verse 2 | friendly voice getting slightly unhinged] Hello, neighbor! How do you do? I've got a special surprise for you! The trolley's coming down the track, But I don't think it's coming back! The puppets are dancing, The curtains are red, King Friday's standing on his head! [Music stops] **TEQUILA!** [Bridge | gentle piano | innocent television host voice] Won't you be my neighbor? Won't you stay awhile? Everybody's happy, Everybody smile! [Pause | whisper] What's that in your cup? [Full band explodes] **TEQUILA!** [Extended instrumental | wild saxophone solo | twangy guitar | heavy stomping beat | playful organ] [Final verse | increasingly frantic but still cheerful] It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood, Things are getting misunderstood! The trolley's gone, The clock is wrong, And everybody's singing this song! One little neighbor! Two little neighbors! Three little neighbors! [Complete silence] **TEQUILA!!!** [Outro | soft piano returns | calm friendly male voice] Well, neighbors, it's been a wonderful day. I think I'll just sit down now. [Long awkward pause] [Whisper] Tequila. [Single piano note | abrupt stop]
