[Intro – slurred chant] Gran-ma… What you put in that? (grandma laugh) [Chorus – wobble chant] Fruitcake! Fruitcake! Why it burn my face, fruitcake? Fruitcake! Fruitcake! Grandma put the rum in fruitcake! (Repeat x2) [Verse 1 – silly confession] One bite, feel funny Two bites, feel brave Three bites, I’m tellin’ secrets I should not have gave Sticky hands Wobbly feet Why the cake keep starin’ at me? [Chorus – louder, messier] Fruitcake! Fruitcake! Why it burn my face, fruitcake? Fruitcake! Fruitcake! Grandma put the rum in fruitcake! [Break – call & response] Who made it? (GRANDMA!) What’s in it? (DON’T ASK!) Is it safe? (…MAYBE!) [Verse 2 – chaotic] Candied fruit Mystery spice Is that bourbon Or just… ice? Grandma winked That’s a sign This cake been marinating since ’99! [Final Chorus – chant overload] Fruitcake! Fruitcake! Why it burn my face, fruitcake? Fruitcake! Fruitcake! Grandma put the rum in fruitcake! [Outro – drunk hard stop] I love you, grandma… FRUITCAKE!
