I Don't Care Anymore

I used to map out every step I'd take Calculate the risk of every move I'd make Measured every word, weighed every choice Buried every dream beneath the safer noise I had my reasons, had my alibis Had a thousand ways to justify the lies But the man I was is standing in the rearview now And I'm not slowing down to wave goodbye somehow You can keep your warnings, keep your what-ifs and your fear Keep your careful living — I am done with all of that out here Something broke inside me and it felt like breaking free And I don't recognize the man I used to be I don't care anymore About the rules I built to keep me safe before I don't care anymore About the life I had behind that closed door Burn it all, burn it down Let the ashes fall onto the ground I don't care anymore — Watch me walk away and not look back for more I used to lose sleep over what they'd think Standing on the edge, too scared to even blink Every little setback felt like the end Every risk I took I'd try to take back again But now I'm standing out here in the open air Wind against my face and I don't stop to care The version of me that lived inside that shell Can stay behind and rot in his comfortable hell You can keep your structure, keep your safety and your doubt Keep your second-guessing — I've got nothing to figure out Something woke inside me like a match against a wall And I'm finally alive enough to risk the fall I don't care anymore About the rules I built to keep me safe before I don't care anymore About the life I had behind that closed door Burn it all, burn it down Let the ashes fall onto the ground I don't care anymore — Watch me walk away and not look back for more Wish for safety — got nothing Wish for comfort — got nothing Wish for someone to hold you back — Got nothing, nothing, nothing left So what do you do when the cage falls apart? When the lock finally breaks and you open your heart? You laugh at the man who was too scared to live And you take everything that life has left to give I don't care anymore About the rules I built to keep me safe before I don't care anymore About the life I had behind that closed door Burn it all, burn it down Let the ashes fall onto the ground I don't care anymore — I don't care, I don't care I am finally — ALIVE I don't care... Not anymore... You know what the funny thing is? I spent years — years — building walls to keep myself in and calling it discipline calling it responsibility calling it being smart Turns out I was just afraid That's all it ever was Just fear dressed up in a suit And fear's got nothing on me now Not. Anymore.