[Verse 1] Hello po, my name is Chloe, I just land sa LAX Thirteen hours from Manila, ay grabe my legs pa-wreck! Mama say, “Behave ha,” but I cannot stop my scream Everything so shiny, parang I’m inside a dream! I ride the big big van, no jeepney flashing lights No “para po!” just seatbelt, everybody polite I look outside the window, ha?! Walang sari-sari store?! Only big big house, big big grass, big big garage door! [Chorus] Oh my gosh, Americaaaa! So many surprise sa akiin! No tindera shouting “Tahoôô!” in the morning No teacher with taktak ruler when you naughty! Oh my gosh, Americaaaa! Everything so tall and clean I feel like I’m living inside the Disney screen! [Verse 2] First day sa school, ay susmariasep! The kids talk back to teacher, “Ma’am, that homework super bleh!” I wait for the whack-whack, the classic tsinelas fly But teacher just say, “Okay class, let’s talk about feelings, why?” I raise my hand so high, I whisper, “Ma’am, bawal po ba talaga?!” She smile and say, “Here you can speak,” I almost cry with “Waaa!” At lunch I look for rice, ha? Only pizza, burger, fries I ask my new friend Kayla, “Where the kanin? Where the ulam lies?” She laugh and give me mac and cheese, it yellow like the sun I eat one bite and shout, “Ay winner! This is super fun!” [Chorus] Oh my gosh, Americaaaa! The milk comes cold from giant fridge! The doggos wear the clothes and shoes, parang they going prestige! Oh my gosh, Americaaaa! Halloween? They give free candy! I thought only Christmas lang we get that, grabe heaven na di ba, tita? [Bridge (half-talk, half-rap, super fast and excited)] No tricycle honk-honk, only Tesla quiet “shhh” No labada in the river, they got machine go swish-swish-swish! The toilet paper super soft, parang cloud sa pwet Back home we use tabo, here they scared to get it wet! Snow?! Real snow?! I scream, “Si Jack Frost ginawa real?!” I try to make snowman, pero my fingers almost peel! [Last Chorus (even louder, with ad-libs)] Oh my gosh, Americaaaa! So many surprise every dayyy! (every dayyy!) But sometimes I miss the dirty ice cream and the “uy ingay!” Still I love it here, promise, I will never be the same Your Chloe from Pampanga now shouting “This is my new game!” [Final line (cute whisper)] Salamat po, America… But can you please add more rice? Hehe. [Mic drop with giggles]
