# THE DEVIL I CREATED ### [INTRO] *Distant choir. Rain. One clean guitar picking slowly.* They always told me... "There's something wrong with you." Maybe they were right. But nobody ever asked... **What happened to you?** *Low distorted guitar enters.* Maybe the devil wasn't waiting for me. Maybe... **I built him myself.** --- ### [VERSE 1] I created a creature from the pieces of my pain, Gave him every fucking memory I wanted to erase, Fed him every insecurity, every ounce of my rage, Then I wondered why he started looking back from my face. I gave him all my anger, gave him everything I hated, Gave him every broken promise, every time I felt forsaken, Every person that abandoned me became another statement, Every wound became a brick and every brick became his basement. I let him live inside me. Let him tell me who to trust. Let him turn my love to anger. Let him turn my fear to lust. Let him whisper that revenge was somehow better than forgiveness, Then I wondered why my heart was slowly turning into distance. I can't blame him for the things that I allowed him to become, I can't blame the fucking darkness for the damage that I've done, If I point my finger at the devil, three are pointing back at me, And that's the hardest fucking truth that I've ever had to see. --- ### [PRE-CHORUS] *Melodic* I made a monster... Then I taught him how to breathe. I gave him all my hatred... Now he's staring back at me. --- ### [CHORUS] **I CREATED THE DEVIL I FEAR!** Put my pain in his heart and my anger in his ears, Gave him every fucking reason just to keep me living here, Now I'm looking in the mirror and the devil's standing near. **I CREATED THE DEVIL I FEAR!** Every scar, every loss, every fucking wasted year, I became what I hated just to keep myself protected, Now I gotta face the monster... **I CREATED IN MYSELF.** --- ### [VERSE 2] *Heavy groove + technical rap* I got a psychological cycle that's violently vitalized, Pain gets internalized, anger gets weaponized, Trauma gets memorized, trust gets minimized, Then I wonder why the people that I love feel terrified. I was building up defenses while destroying every bridge, Calling isolation independence, calling anger fucking strength, Every time somebody reached me, I would push 'em from the edge, Then complain that nobody was around when I was sick. That's the contradiction. That's the fucking consequence. You can't keep burning bridges Then blame the world for the distance. You can't keep feeding hatred Then pretend that you're innocent. You can't keep breaking hearts Then call yourself the victim. I know. I've made mistakes. I've said things I can't retract. I've pushed away the people That were trying to have my back. I've let anger speak for me When I should've just relaxed. Then I blamed everybody else For the person looking back. But accountability ain't weakness. It's admitting what you did. It's looking at the damage Without running from the shit. It's accepting that the devil Wasn't always something external. Sometimes the worst enemy Is the voice you let live in you. --- ### [CHORUS] **I CREATED THE DEVIL I FEAR!** Put my pain in his heart and my anger in his ears, Gave him every fucking reason just to keep me living here, Now I'm looking in the mirror and the devil's standing near. **I CREATED THE DEVIL I FEAR!** Every scar, every loss, every fucking wasted year, I became what I hated just to keep myself protected, Now I gotta face the monster... **I CREATED IN MYSELF.** --- ### [BRIDGE] *Piano. Choir. Almost whispered.* Maybe I don't need to kill the devil... Maybe I need to understand him. Maybe he was born Every time somebody hurt me. Every time somebody left. Every time I felt worthless. Every time I chose anger Because anger hurt less than grief. *Silence.* Maybe... He was just trying to protect me. --- ### [VERSE 3] *Explodes into rapid technical delivery* So I stare at the face of the beast that I designed, See the pain in his expression and the fear behind his eyes, He ain't asking for forgiveness, he ain't asking to be praised, He's just asking why I left him in the darkness all these days. I told him, "You protected me." He said, "I know." I said, "You hurt me." He said, "I know." I said, "You hurt everybody that I loved." He said, "I know." Then he looked at me and whispered: **"But you wouldn't let me go."** That's when everything collapsed. All the anger. All the shame. All the years of fucking running From responsibility and blame. I realized that every demon That I tried to suffocate Was a piece of me demanding That I finally fucking change. So I don't wanna destroy him. I don't wanna let him win. I'ma teach him how to live Without controlling everything. I'ma take the rage and redirect it, Take the pain and recollect it, Take the pieces I neglected And rebuild what I neglected. I was never born a monster. I became one piece by piece.
