How do I keep you warm

[Verse 1] I keep a list of names beside the kitchen sink A chipped blue mug, a note in somebody’s ink You call me when the floor gives way beneath your feet I bring what I can carry, leave my shoes out in the street I patch the seams with borrowed thread and careful hands Say, “Take your time; I know the shape of where you stand” Then walk back home with every doorway in my chest And nowhere left inside myself to come to rest [Pre-Chorus] I thought a heart could stretch and never split I thought that love was measured by the lives I could repair But every room I open asks for more of it And I’m still standing in the doorway, disappearing there [Chorus] I want to mend every break, give every heart its due But the more I make room, the less room I have to move I gather all the pieces, then I come apart alone How do I keep you warm and still come home? [Verse 2] Your sister’s on the phone; the rent is late again My oldest friend can’t sleep; I count the hours with him I learn the little signs before you say you’re not okay Then swallow my own sentence so yours has space to stay There’s a chair beside the window with my coat across the back A book I meant to finish, unopened, gathering dust You ask me if I’m tired; I smile and say, “Not yet” The hardest truth to tell is one I haven’t told myself [Pre-Chorus] I thought that care could make a body wide enough To hold a dozen storms and still be standing there But love is not a promise to be endlessly enough And I can’t heal you by pretending I’m not here [Chorus] I want to mend every break, give every heart its due But the more I make room, the less room I have to move I gather all the pieces, then I come apart alone How do I keep you warm and still come home? [Bridge] Let me set one burden down beside the door Not because I love you less than I did before I can sit beside you; I can tell the truth I am not the only shelter you can turn to [Final Chorus] I want to mend every break, but I can’t do it all I’ll meet you where you are; I won’t pretend I never fall We gather up the pieces, leave some room for us to grow I can love you deeply and still come home [Outro] The blue mug waits beside the sink I take one breath before I speak I’m here, I’m here— And I am here for me