[ obsessive emotional loop, raw confessional delivery, close-mic female vocal, restrained verses with spiraling tension, breathy intensity, near-breaking vulnerability, fixation and release, intimate volatility, emotional claustrophobia ] [verse 1] there’s something in my head full to the edges not loud, just… there like it’s waiting I keep trying to lift it bring it with me set it down between us unchanged but it won’t move like that it won’t come whole [pre-chorus] so I start small like I always do [chorus] pulling a bucket through a straw trying to keep what I saw it comes out thinner than it was edges fading as it goes you see something I can tell but it’s not the same I held [verse 2] I think if I rushed it it would fall apart spill over the edges before it starts so I go slow measure each piece watch it change as it leaves and I can feel it thinning even as I try like the weight of it doesn’t survive [pre-chorus] it shifts shape in the air between [chorus] pulling a bucket through a straw losing pieces as I talk you get outlines ghosted lines something close but not quite mine it was vivid it was full now it’s partial now it’s dull [verse 3] and it’s not just one it’s never just one it’s a sky full of them lit up at once I don’t know where to even begin so I pick one star and it dims trying to hold it long enough to make it through without it breaking [bridge] like painting a sunset in graphite wrong tools wrong light you get the shape of where it glows but not the warmth I’m thinking of a gallery of sketches pinned in rows each one trying each one close none of them what I meant [final chorus] pulling a bucket through a straw watching it change into something small you hold pieces I had the whole before it slipped before it slowed it was bright it was clear now it’s barely still here [outro] I wish I could hand it to you all at once no loss no blur just the way it is before it turns but it never does
