[Verse 1] Sipping my green tea Agent on the phone like “Baby Trust me” Says I need “mystique” I’m in sweatpants Crumbs on my white tee He’s talking cheekbones I’m talking discounts Two-for-one scones He wants a runway I just want Wi‑Fi and a long day [Pre-Chorus] He says “Picture this Paris in June” I’m like “Picture this… fork and a spoon” Over my mug I make a plan To scare this man as hard as I can (oh yeah) [Chorus] Green tea Bad agent Banana salad He wants glamour I want madness I’ll show up to the casting With a bowl so massive Green tea Bad agent Banana salad He talks diet I talk radness If I’m gonna be your star I’m doing it my way With a fork full of chaos today [Verse 2] He sends a meal plan Three almonds One leaf That’s the “new brand” I send a selfie Dressing my lettuce like a sundae Bananas in slices Stacked in the salad like fashion prizes He texts “Are you serious?” I text a crouton selfie Mysterious [Pre-Chorus] He says “Think couture Clean and refined” I say “Think couture… but add a rind” Spinach and fruit It’s all on theme I’m serving looks and vitamin C (hey!) [Chorus] Green tea Bad agent Banana salad He wants glamour I want madness I’ll show up to the casting With a bowl so massive Green tea Bad agent Banana salad He talks diet I talk radness If I’m gonna be your star I’m doing it my way With a fork full of chaos today [Bridge] [beat drops to claps and bass] Walk in Catwalk Leafy crown Bananas bouncing up and down He whispers “Act like you’re icy” I wink “I’m more like spicy” Models stare But then they grin “Where’d you get that dressing?” (let us in) Agent sighing by the door Book me twice You’ll beg for more [Chorus] Green tea Bad agent Banana salad He wants glamour I want madness I’ll show up to the casting With a bowl so massive Green tea Bad agent Banana salad World goes crazy for this gladness If I’m gonna be your star You’ll remember my name As the snack that just rewrote the game
