[Spoken Intro] (Sound of a lighter flicking, slow exhale, wind blowing) Yeah. Freezing cold out here in Minnesota. Just another Tuesday, innit? Badge is polished. Let’s go see what’s occurring. [Verse 1] (Rapped, conversational flow) Meet Jerry, top lad, always had a knack For finding the smallest kid and giving him a whack Back in Year Nine, behind the bike shed wall He’d nick your lunch money, make you feel well small Teachers said, "Jerry, you’ve got issues, mate" But Jerry knew better, it was just his fate To be the big dog, the one holding the leash Now he’s swapped the playground for a brand new niche See, the bullying didn’t stop, it just got legit Given a uniform that doesn’t quite fit But the power does, fits like a glove Doing the job that he pretends to love [Chorus] (Sung melodically, soft and sweet contrast) Oh, Jerry’s on patrol, keeping us safe and sound Walking ten feet tall on borrowed ground He’s the hero of the story in his own little head While the mothers are crying and the news is read Yeah, Jerry’s feeling righteous, Jerry’s feeling grand King of the castle in a stolen land [Verse 2] (Rapped, slightly darker tone) So he clocks in early, coffee in his hand Checking the list, making his demand He sees a family, scared, huddled in a van And Jerry thinks, "Time to show ‘em I’m the man" He loves the chase, gets the heart rate pumping Better than the old days, better than a thumping He spots a runner, turning to flee Jerry grins wide, thinks, "This one’s for me" Raise the piece, steady the breath, take aim Shooting in the back? Mate, it’s all in the game Claim he felt threatened, claim he saw a gun Paperwork’s a doddle when the damage is done Cruelty’s the point, yeah, the cruelty’s the perk Just another honest day of hard work [Verse 3] (Rapped, laid back, cynical) And he looks up top, to his mate Big Don The one giving the nod to carry on Jerry thinks they’re pals, sitting in the same boat Reading from the same script, quote for quote "Turn a blind eye," that’s the unwritten rule Just like the teachers back at the school Only now the stakes are life and breath And Jerry’s handing out sentences of death He reckons he’s a patriot, defending the soil While the blood and the tears begin to boil He doesn’t see the human, he just sees the prey Justifying the hate in a bureaucratic way [Chorus] (Sung melodically, soft and sweet contrast) Oh, Jerry’s on patrol, keeping us safe and sound Walking ten feet tall on borrowed ground He’s the hero of the story in his own little head While the mothers are crying and the news is read Yeah, Jerry’s feeling righteous, Jerry’s feeling grand King of the castle in a stolen land [Outro] (Spoken Word, music fading out over guitar strum) Yeah. Just doing his job, apparently. Top lad, Jerry. Real pillar of the community. Sleeps like a baby, too. Mad world, innit? Bit of a fiasco, if you ask me. Peace in Minnesota. [End]
